“Good writing is always about things that are important to you, things that are scary to you, things that eat you up. But the writing is a way of not allowing those things to destroy you.”
— John Edgar Wideman
I go through these sinusoidal episodes where I write about my journey as a person. A world where things just aren’t perfect. And I, like everyone else who graces this planet, am struggling to find where I fit in the world. And when I’m swimming in the depths of self-discovery, I find that for an audience of entrepreneurs and investors, I really haven’t written much about my discoveries and re-discoveries in the wonderful land of innovation. The other half of it is for my fear of knowledge atrophy.
And so, I spend back to back to back weeks writing about the inner workings and the robust mental models of some of the world’s top intellectual athletes. Then in hindsight, once again, I realize that my blog begins to read just like any other business blog – any other startup, VC, tech blog – out there. And I fear that I’ve lost my voice. So, I re-embark on a literary path of introspection and growth.
The great Charlie Kaufman once said about his time on Adam Resnick’s show, Get a Life, “Adam Resnick’s scripts were the best on the show. And we all tried to write in Adam’s voice. That was the job. And I was frustrated with my results. But it occurred to me that there was no solution to this problem as long as my job was to imitate someone else’s voice. I can maybe get close but I was never going to get better at it than Adam.
“The obvious solution was not to throw my hands up but try to find myself in a situation where I was doing me, not someone else. Do you. It isn’t easy, but it’s essential. It’s not easy because there’s a lot in the way. In many cases, a major obstacle is your deeply seated belief that ‘you’ is not interesting. And since convincing yourself that you are interesting is probably not going to happen, take it off the table. Agree.
“Perhaps I’m not interesting, but I am the only thing I have to offer. And I want to offer something. And by offering myself in a true way, I am doing a great service to the world. Because it is rare and it will help. As I move through time, things change. I change. The world changes. The way the world sees me changes.”
As a product of what I can only describe as a game of tug-of-war between my right and left brain, I start many essays and unfortunately, lose interest half-way through writing them. As such, I’ve amassed a far-reaching graveyard of zombie posts. Eclectic, disparate monologues. Neither fully alive nor fully dead. Some may see a phoenixlike revival. Others may forever rest as vestigial drafts until Indiana Jones excavates them.
But nevertheless, the act of writing to think – to express – hones my mind like a whetstone to a kitchen knife. The more I do so, the sharper I get. Yet too much so, without application, renders the act of sharpening useless.
A few days back, I stumbled across a fascinating tweet on atrophy and hypertrophy.
There are many things in life that atrophy over time – knowledge, skills, presence. Yet there are a handful of things that hypertrophy – brain, demand for proof, and space, just to name a few. For me, writing exists in both categories. Like most skills, it is perishable. Yet the more I see, hear, and learn, the more I demand to myself that I need to put pen on paper. A personal intellectual renaissance.
Photo by Ágatha Depiné on Unsplash
#unfiltered is a series where I share my raw thoughts and unfiltered commentary about anything and everything. It’s not designed to go down smoothly like the best cup of cappuccino you’ve ever had (although here‘s where I found mine), more like the lonely coffee bean still struggling to find its identity (which also may one day find its way into a more thesis-driven blogpost). Who knows? The possibilities are endless.
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