This past week, my friends were sending me one of the latest Shark Tank episodes (apologies for not finding a better fidelity video), asking me: Would you have invested?
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/7Yf2BrfC_ww
If this link dies due to copyright issues (since I haven’t waited till ABC puts out their original version), just Google “Shark Tank Eyewris”
But I bring it up not because I’m here to share what my thoughts on the deal, but because of a powerful lesson shared on Shark Tank’s Season 14 finale.
The best thing you can get in life is often to have the best partners. That’s true in business. That’s true in romance. And that’s true in life.
And yes, it’s also true in venture. As a founder, it’s not about who gives you the most money. Or gives your business the greatest valuation. Unfortunately, both are often vanity metrics, underscored in the 2020 and 2021 bull era. It’s about partnering with the right partners who can take you to the next stage. Partners who will keep you honest. Partners who will call you out on your BS. And partners who will tell you the things you don’t want to hear, who will have you do the things you don’t wanna do, so that you can be the founder you were meant to be.
In careers, it’s no less true. I’ve always looked at careers from the perspective of who can I learn the most from. It hasn’t always been the highest paying or the biggest brand. Frankly, it was easy to turn down both of the before if I didn’t feel like I would spending the next few years working with the best. Not only in terms of acumen, but also in how much they cared.
Over 8 yrs ago someone singlehandedly pulled me out of poverty. Knew him because I trained with his wife who is a professional athlete. He was leading a group at Citi and I desperately wanted to be an analyst. Didnt have the resume for a fancy banking job but grew up in public… pic.twitter.com/K8aZoUcrVA
To think that one doesn’t need others to succeed, that’s foolish.
#unfiltered is a series where I share my raw thoughts and unfiltered commentary about anything and everything. It’s not designed to go down smoothly like the best cup of cappuccino you’ve ever had (although here‘s where I found mine), more like the lonely coffee bean still struggling to find its identity (which also may one day find its way into a more thesis-driven blogpost). Who knows? The possibilities are endless.
Stay up to date with the weekly cup of cognitive adventures inside venture capital and startups, as well as cataloging the history of tomorrow through the bookmarks of yesterday!
The views expressed on this blogpost are for informational purposes only. None of the views expressed herein constitute legal, investment, business, or tax advice. Any allusions or references to funds or companies are for illustrative purposes only, and should not be relied upon as investment recommendations. Consult a professional investment advisor prior to making any investment decisions.
An old college friend reached out to me not too long ago and asked me if I had any tips to share on getting a mentor. And the first thing I responded with is: “Don’t ask people to be your mentor. In fact, don’t even mention the word mentorship.”
You see, mentorship is a loaded word. It comes with baggage. Centuries of it. Hell, millennia of it. And apparently, dating as far back as 3,000 years ago to Homer’s Odyssey. Mentorship comes with an expectation of commitment. While that amount of commitment differs per person, a mentorship ask from a stranger is an amorphous expectation of time and energy from a busy person who likely has a laundry list of other priorities. Without any precedence or context, it’s hard to make that decision with asymmetric information.
The best pairs of mentorship have always been a two-way street. It takes two to tango. If we were to take the equation of a line:
y = mx + b
… a mentee wants a mentor whose current b, or position and experience level in time, is greater than their own. A mentor wants a mentee whose m (rate of learning, iteration, and hustle) is as great or greater than their own. The bet is that at some point in the future, at least in my experience, mentors would like to learn from their mentees as well, and/or see it paid forward.
Yet, I see so many mentees out there who discount their own value in the relationship. One of my mentors shared with me a few years ago that the older you are, the younger your mentors should be. And I’ve carried that in my heart ever since. More recently, I found that line in the form of a tweet from Samir Kaji.
Was at a VC quarterly meeting today and the topic of aging out in VC/tech came up (which I think is BS)
Their response on how they stay fresh in mental models was around the thinking of "the older you get, the younger your mentors should be".
I can’t claim to have mentored tons of folks, but I also realize both from anecdotal experience and talking with my mentors that the best thing about mentorship is the feedback. That the mentors learn about the result of their advice as an opportunity to finetune their own learnings.
Take for example, my office hours. Of the hundred or so people I’ve met through open office hours, I’ve probably shared the same piece of advice at most five times. It gets even more interesting when you consider that the vast majority of people I’ve met via office hours come for fundraising advice. Somewhere in the ballpark of 80% of people. While there are similar thematic questions I ask people to consider, the best advice is tailored to every unique situation. That said, my advice, like any others’, starts as a product of my own anecdotal experience. A sample size of one. And as we learned in Stats 1 in high school or college, that’s a poor sample size. So, one of the best ways for me to refine my own learnings is either:
Act on it again and again. But there are some things in life I can’t do again. For instance, high school or freshman year of college or my first job. Those are experiences entombed in amber that unless I had a time machine, they’re one and done.
Learn how other people execute on that advice and what resulted of it.
One of the many joys of writing this blog is that every so often a kind reader reaches out to me and shares the results of them implementing the thoughts I’ve shared here. Then they let me know I’m either full of s**t or I drastically helped them grow. And I love both forms of feedback equally as much. After all, it’s the rate of compounded learning that helps me mature — even if it’s outside of my own anecdotal experience. Feedback and learning of others’ results gives me a sample size greater than one. The same is true for other mentors, advisors, and investors out there.
So, what does that mean tactically?
Start with the ask.
There’s a metaphorical saying in the world of venture that investors invest in lines, not dots. They want to see progression rather than stagnation. So in reaching out to anyone you’d want to learn from, don’t lead with “Can I have 30 minutes of your time?” Instead, lead with a question. Why are you reaching out? What question can only they answer?
So, that means, “should I get an MBA?” is not a good question to ask. It’s generic, doesn’t contextualize the question, and you can figure out how to do so on the internet. On the flip side, a better question would be: “I saw that you graduated from Wharton before breaking into VC. So I’m curious, did you always know you wanted to be in VC, or was that something you discovered in B-school? And what experiences did you gain in B-school that set you up for VC?”
Moreover, show you’ve spent time in the idea maze before proposing the question to the person you want to learn from. “I’ve read about X and Y, and have thought about or tried A and B already with these results. But the question still gnaws at me.”
Why does this contextualization matter? One, it gives that person context to better answer your question. Two, the last thing any person giving advice wants is for their advice to dissipate into the cosmos. For their advice to go to naught. And if you show that you’ve spend blood, sweat and tears already pondering the problem, then you’re more likely to take their advice seriously. In effect, their advice will be a lot more meaningful. And, chances are you’re going to be a lot less whimsical than the average person asking for their time. Use someone’s time in a way that won’t feel wasted.
Follow up even if they ghost you.
If they respond the first time, great. And if not, don’t give up until you’ve sent at least three emails. If they don’t respond the first time, they just might not have seen it. If they don’t respond after the ninth email, they’re just not interested.
And with each email follow up, tell them when you plan to follow up since you assume they’re busy. “If you’re too busy, I completely understand and I’ll follow up in two weeks.” On the last email if no response, thank them for their time and wish them well.
Don’t set recurring meetings (initially).
First of all, it’s a heavy ask to anyone — stranger or not. Second of all, there’s no promise that their time (and your time) won’t be wasted. Third, do you even have that much to ask about? Most of the time, you don’t. What you think you want and what you actually need are usually very different. It’s an iterative process.
Instead, start with a single question. Ask it. If they’re free for a meeting, set 20 minutes (here‘s why I like 20, instead of 30). If not, get their thoughts asynchronously. Get advice. Act on the advice (or not, but be intentional if not). The most important part is to share your results with the origin of that advice.
So, when you close out that initial meeting, ask if you can reach out to them 24 or 48 hours later after you’ve had time to mull on it or act on it. Timeframe will vary. And if you do follow up shortly after without results, limit any additional ask to 1-2 questions, max. Ideally it should take them 2-3 minutes to respond to. For any advice that takes a longer feedback loop, set a time in the future (two weeks, a month, 2 months, etc.) later to reach back out to share your learnings. And sometimes, that means you didn’t implement their advice. Why not? What did you learn from doing the counterfactual?
When you reach back out to share your learnings, see if you can jump on another 20 minute call, or shorter. And get their thoughts on the facts. Possibly get more advice. And do that again and again. Until at some point — my litmus test is usually 3-4 of these discrete exchanges, in no particular frequency —, I ask if we can get something recurring on the calendar. Nothing long. Stick to 20 minutes. And set an end date for the recurring nature. I usually do 4-5 times as the first run through.
At the end of those recurring meetings, be honest and mutually evaluate: Was it a good use of everyone’s time? If not, end it, but reach back out periodically to share your thanks, especially around the holiday season. If it does work, set another set of recurring meetings and reevaluate again in X time. And voila, you have yourself a mentor (in the traditional sense).
One more note on this… if that person is extremely busy and you know they are, sometimes a more personal touch to the email is recording a Loom and asking your question in front of a camera to that person in particular. For any Loom video, I wouldn’t go over a minute of recording time. Keep it concise, and use text to describe everything else.
Build a platform where they can share their advice with others.
Either start a podcast or a blog. Or help them find an audience that is outside of yourself —a fireside chat, a club, a non-profit, posting a Twitter thread or LinkedIn post, and so on. Their time is limited, and if they’re likely to give that same piece of advice to many others, help them find the tribe of people who are willing to listen to their advice. So instead of their advice being one-to-one, it’s one-to-many. In sum, a larger impact radius.
Of course, the caveat here is if the advice you seek is personal experience that isn’t suited for a stage, then don’t do it.
In closing
Some of the mentors I have today are folks I’ve known for years, but neither of us remember the discrete date in which it all started. Simply put, “it just happened.” There are others where we’ve never explicitly said we were mentor and mentee. Yet, I learn just as much if not more than if I had explicitly asked for mentorship. The same is true for some of the “mentees” I have.
At the same time, I wouldn’t discount the fact that you can truly find mentors everywhere in your life. Too many people focus on only finding strategic mentors, but fail to see the value in tactical and peer mentors, which I wrote more about three years back.
Stay up to date with the weekly cup of cognitive adventures inside venture capital and startups, as well as cataloging the history of tomorrow through the bookmarks of yesterday!
Any views expressed on this blog are mine and mine alone. They are not a representation of values held by On Deck, DECODE, or any other entity I am or have been associated with. They are for informational and entertainment purposes only. None of this is legal, investment, business, or tax advice. Please do your own diligence before investing in startups and consult your own adviser before making any investments.
“Two of our biggest clients pulled the rug on us. They just cut their budgets, and can’t pay us anymore.”
“My co-founder had to leave. His wife just lost her job, and he needs to find a stable job to support the family.”
“I don’t think we’ll make it, David. How do we break it to our team?”
It was June 2020. The above were three of a dozen or so calls I had with founders so far who couldn’t make it through the pandemic. But most of the founders who called me weren’t looking for any solutions. In fact, half of them had already decided on their ultimatum before calling me. I could hear the pain in their voices over the phone. Yes, we called on the phone. Neither them nor I had the luxury of beautifying or blurring our backgrounds on Zoom or to try to look presentable. The only thing we had between us was the raw reality of the world.
Those conversations inspired me to compile a list of hard-won insights and advice from some of the best at their craft. A Rolodex of tactical and contrarian insights that a founder can pull from any time, so that you are well-equipped for times in the startup journey in which you’ll need them. I don’t know when you will, or even if you will, but I know someone will. Even if that someone is just myself.
Below are bits and pieces of insights that I’ve selectively collected over several months that might prove useful for founders. As time went on, I found myself to be more and more selective with the advice I add on to this list, as a function of my own growth as well as the industry’s growth.
I also often find myself wasting many a calorie in starting from a simple idea and extrapolating into something more nuanced. And while many ideas deserve the nuance I give them, if not more, some of the most important lessons in life are simple in nature. The 99 soundbites below cover everything, in no particular order other than categorical resonance, including:
Some might be more contrarian than others. You might not use every single piece of advice now or for your current business or ever. After all, they’re 100% unsolicited. At the end of the day, all advice is autobiographical. Nevertheless, I imagine they’ll be useful tools in your toolkit to help you grow over the course of your career, as they have with mine.
Oh, why 99 tips, and not 100? Things that end in 9 feel like a bargain, whereas things that end in 0 feel like a luxury. We can thank left-digit bias for that. Dammit, if you count this tip, that’s 100!
To preface, none of this is legal investment advice. This content is for informational purposes only, and should not be relied upon as legal, business, investment, or tax advice. Please consult your own adviser before making any investments.
On fundraising…
1/ Some useful benchmarks and goals for stages of funding:
<$1M: pre-seed
Find what PMF looks like and how to measure it
$1-5M: seed
$2-4M – you found PMF already and you’re gearing up to scale
$5M – you’re ready for the A
$5-20: Series A *timestamped mid-2021, your mileage may vary in different fundraising climates
2/ If you’re a hotly growing startup, time to term sheet is on the magnitude of a couple of weeks. If not, you’re looking at months*. Prepare your fundraising schedule accordingly. *timestamped mid-2021, your mileage may vary in different fundraising climates
3/ On startup accelerators… If you’re a first-time founder, go for the knowledge and peer and tactical mentorship. If you’re a second- or third-time founder, go for the network and distribution.
4/ Legal fees are often borne by founders in the first priced round. And are usually $2-5K at the seed stage. $10-20K at the A. Investor council fee is $25-50K. So by the A, may come out to a $75-100K cost for founders.
5/ If you’re raising from VCs with large funds (i.e. $100M+), don’t have an exit slide. It may seem counterintuitive, but by having one, you’ve capped your exit value. Most early stage investors want to see 50-100x returns, to return the fund. And if their expected upside isn’t big enough, it won’t warrant the amount of risk they’re going to take to make back the fund. With angels or VCs with sub-$20M funds, it doesn’t matter as much.
6/ “Stop taking fundraising advice from VCs*. Would you take dating advice from a super model? In both cases, they’re working with an embarrassment of riches and are poor predictors of their own future behaviors. Advice from VCs is based on what they think they want versus what they want.” – Taylor Margot, founder of Keys *Footnote: Unless they’ve been through the fundraising process – either for their fund or previous startup.
7/ These days, it’s incredibly popular for founders to set up data rooms for their investors. What are data rooms? A central hub of a startup’s critical materials for investors when they do due diligence. Keep it on a Google Drive, Dropbox, Docsend, or Notion. Usually for startups that have some traction and early numbers, but what goes in a pre-seed one, pre-revenue, or even pre-product?
Pitch deck + appendix slides
Current round investment docs
Use of funds
Current and proforma cap table
Pilot usage data, if any
References + links to everyone’s LinkedIn:
Key members of management
1-2 customers, if any
1-2 investors, if any
Financials: annual + YTD P&L + projections
Slightly controversial on projections. Some investors want to see how founders think about the long term, plus runway after capital injection. Some investors don’t care since it’s all guesswork. Rule of thumb at pre-seed is don’t go any further than 2-3 years.
List of all FAQ investor questions throughout the fundraising process
Press, if any
Legal stuff: Patents, trademarks, IP assignments, articles of incorporation
8/ If you’re a pre-seed, pre-revenue, or even pre-product, you don’t need all of the above points in tip #7. Just stick to pitch deck/appendix, investment docs, use of funds, and current/proforma cap table.
9/ Investors invest in lines not dots. Start “fundraising”, aka building relationships, early with investors even before you need to fundraise. Meet 1-2 investors every week. Touch base with who would be the “best dollars on your cap table” every quarter. With their permission, get them on your monthly investor update. So that you can raise capital without having to send that pitch deck.
10/ Don’t take more money than you actually need when fundraising. While it’s sexy to take the $6M round on $30M valuation pre-product and will guarantee you a fresh spot on TechCrunch and Forbes, your future self will thank you for not taking those terms to maintain control and governance and preserve your mental sanity. Too many cooks in the kitchen too early on can be distracting. And taking on higher valuations comes with increased expectations.
11/ If you’re getting inbound financing, aka investor is reaching out to you, decide between two paths: (a) ignore, or (b) engage. If you choose the first path (a), when you ignore one, get comfortable ignoring them all – with very few exceptions i.e. your dream investors, which should be a very short list. Capital is a commodity. Your biggest strength is your focus on actually building your business. For undifferentiated VCs, understand speed is their competitive advantage. Fundraising at that point, for you the founder, is a distraction. If you choose (b) engage, set up the process. As you get inbound, go outbound. Build a market of options to choose from. Inspired by Phin Barnes.
12/ If you haven’t chatted with an investor in a while (>3 months), remind them why they (should) love you. Here’s a framework I like: “Hi, it’s been a minute. The last time we chatted about Y. And you suggested Z. Here’s what I’ve done about Z since the last time we chatted.“
13/ If you have a business everyone agrees on, you don’t have a venture-backable business. Alphas are low in perfect competition and businesses that are common sense. You’re going to generate a low 2-5x return on their capital, depending on how obvious your idea is.
Strive for disagreement. Be contrarian. Don’t be afraid to disagree in your pitch. Trying to be a people pleaser won’t get you far. If your investor disagrees with your insight, either you didn’t explain it well or you just don’t need them on your cap table. If the former, go through the 7 year old test. Are you able to explain your idea to a 7-year old? If that 3rd grader does understand, and you have sound logic to get to the insight, and your investor still disagrees, you need to find someone who agrees with strategic direction forward.
It’s not worth your time trying to convince a now-and-future naysayer on a future they don’t believe in. Myself included. There will be some ideas that just don’t make sense to me. While part of it might be ’cause of poor explanation/communication, the other part is I’m just not your guy. And that’s okay.
14/ If a VC asks your earlier investors to give up their pro-rata, and forces you to pick between your earlier investors and that VC, it’s a telltale sign of an unhealthy relationship. If they’re willing to screw your earlier investors over, they’ll have no problem screwing you over if things go south. To analogize, it’s the same as if the person you’re dating asks you to pick between your parents who raised you and them. If they have to force a choice out of you, you’re heading into a toxic relationship where they think they should be the center of the universe.
15/ You can really turn some heads if your pitch deck doesn’t have the same copy/paste answers as every other founder out there. Seems obvious, but this notion becomes especially tested on two particular slides: the go-to-market (GTM) and the competitorslides.
16/ If you want to be memorable, teach your investor something they didn’t know before. To be memorable means you’re likely to get that second meeting.
17/ Focus on answering just one question in your pitch meeting with an investor. That question is dependent on the plausibility of your idea. If your idea is plausible, meaning most people would agree that this should exist in the market, answer “why this.” If your idea is possible, meaning your idea makes sense but there’s not a clear reason for why the market would want it, answer “why now.” If your idea is preposterous, answer “why you.” Why you is not about your X years of experience. It’s about what unique, contrarian insight you developed that is backed by sound logic. That even if the insight is crazy at first glance, it makes sense if you dive deeper. Inspired by Mike Maples Jr.
18/ Beware of investor veto rights in term sheets. Especially around future financing. The verbage won’t say “veto rights,” but rather “no creation of a new series of stock without our approval” or “no amendments to the certificate of incorporation without our approval.”
19/ 99% of syndicate LPs like to be passive capital, since they’re investing 50 other syndicates at the same time. Don’t expect much help or value add from them. But if they’re also a downstream capital allocator, you can leverage that relationship when you go to them for bigger checks in future rounds.
20/ Don’t count on soft commitments. “We will invest in you if X happens.” Soft commitments are easy to make, and don’t require much conviction. X usually hinges on a lead investor or $Y already invested in the startup. Investors who give soft commits are not looking for signal in your business but signal via action from other investors. Effectively, meaning they don’t believe in you, but they will believe in smart people who believe in you.
21/ Just because they’re an A-lister doesn’t mean they’ll bring their A-game. Really get to know your investor beforehand.
22/ If you’re an outsider of the VC world, first step is to accept you are one and that you will have to work much harder to be recognized. “You will be work for investors. The data doesn’t support investing in you. The game is not fair at all. It will be a struggle.” Inspired by Mat Sherman.
23/ Mixing your advisors and investors in the same slide is a red flag for potential investors, unless your advisors also invested. Why? It gives off the impression that you’re hiding things. If the basis of an investment is a 10-year marriage, doubt is the number one killer of potential investor interest.
24/ Too many advisors is also a red flag. “Official” and “unofficial“. Too many distractions. Advisors almost always invest. If they don’t, that’s signaling to say you need their help, but they don’t believe in you enough to invest.
25/ There are also some investors don’t care about your advisors at all, at least on the pitch deck. The pitch deck should be your opportunity to showcase the team who is bleeding and sweating for you. Most advisors just don’t go that far for you. The addendum would be that technical advisors are worth having on there, if you have a deeply technical product.
26/ “Find an investor’s Calendly URL by trying their Twitter handle, and just book a meeting. With so many investor meetings, it’s easy to forget you never scheduled it. Just happened to me and it was both frightening and hilarious.” – Lenny Rachitsky
27/ If you want money, ask for advice. If you want advice, ask for money.
28/ Don’t waste your energy trying to convince investors who strongly disagree to jump onboard. Your time is better spent finding investors who can already see the viability of your vision.
29/ Higher valuations mean greater expectations. You might want to raise for a longer runway, and I’ve seen pitches as great as 36 months of runway, but most investors are still evaluating you on a 12-month runway upon financing round. Can you reach your next milestones (i.e. 10x your KPIs) in a year from now? Higher valuations mean your investor thinks you are more likely and can more quickly capture your TAM at scale than your peers.
30/ As founder, you only need to be good at 3 things: raise money, make money, and hire people to make money. Every investor, when going back to the fundamentals, will evaluate you on these 3 things.
31/ A good distribution of your company’s early angel investors include:
32/ “All investor questions are bad. They are a tell tale sign of objections politely withheld until you are done talking.” Defuse critical questions by incorporating their respective answers into the pitch. For instance, if the question that’ll come up is “How do you think about your competition?”, include a slide that says “We know this is a competitive space, and here’s why we’re doing what we’re doing.” Inspired by Siqi Chen.
33/ “‘Strategics’ (aka non-VCs) may care less about ROI, and more about staying close for competitive intel and downstream optionality.” – Brian Rumao
On managing team/culture…
34/ Align your vacation with when the core team takes their vacation. (i.e. if you’re a product-led team, take your vacations when your engineers and product teams go on vacation)
35/ Please pay yourself as a founder. Some useful founder salary benchmarks:
Seed stage – lowest paid employee
Series A or when you find product-market fit (PMF) – lowest paid engineer
When you hit scale – mid-level engineer
When you’ve reached market dominance – market rate pay for CEOs
If growth slows or stops or hard times hit – cut back to previous compensation, until you grow again
36/ Measure twice, cut once. If you’re going to lay people off, do it once. Lay more people than you think you need to, so you don’t have to do it again. Keep expectations real and don’t leave unnecessary anxiety on the table for those that still work for you.
One of my favorite examples is that, at the start of the pandemic, Alinea, one of the most recognizable names in the culinary business, furloughed every full-time employee, giving them $1000 and paid for 49% of their benefits and health care, eliminated the salaries of owners completely, and reduced the business team and management’s salary by 35%. Not only that, they emailed all their furloughed employees to level expectations and to understand the why. In normal situations, the law states that furloughed employees shouldn’t have access to their work emails, but Nick said “I will break the law on that because this is the pandemic.” For more context, highly recommend checking out Nick’s Medium post and his Eaterinterview, time-stamped at the start of the pandemic.
37/ Take mental health breaks. I’ve met more venture-backed founders who regretted not taking mental health breaks than those who regretted taking them.
38/ Build honesty into your culture, not transparency. And do not conflate the two. Take, for example, you are going through M&A talks with one of the FAAMGs. If you optimize for transparency, this gets a lot of hype among your team members. But let’s say the deal falls through. Your team will be devastated and potentially lose confidence in the business, which can have second-order consequences, like them finding new opportunities or trying to sell their shares on the secondary market. I’ve quoted mmhmm‘s Phil Libinbefore, when he said, “I think the most important job of a CEO is to isolate the rest of the company from fluctuations of the hype cycle because the hype cycle will destroy a company.” Very similarly, full transparency sounds great in theory but will often distract your team from focusing on their priorities.
39/ When in doubt, default to Bezos’ two-pizza rule. Every project/team should be fed by at most two pizzas. In the words of David Sacks, even “the absolute biggest strategic priority could [only] get 10 engineers for 10 weeks.” Don’t overcomplicate and over-bureaucratize things.
40/ Perfect is the enemy of good. Have a “ship-it” mentality. Give yourself an 10-20% margin of error. Equally so, give your team members that same margin so that they’re not scared of making mistakes. It’s less important that mistakes happen, and they will, but more important how you deal with it.
41/ James Currier has a great list of ways to compensate your team and/or community.
Value of using the product (e.g. utility, status, cheaper prices, fun, etc)
Cash (e.g. USD, EUR)
Equity shares (traditional)
Discounted fees
Premier placement and traffic/attention
Status symbols
Early access
Some voting and/or decision making, ability to edit/change
Premier software features
Membership to a valuable clique of other nodes
Real world perks like dinner/tickets to the ball game
Belief in the mission (right-brain, intrinsic)
Commitment to a set of human relationships (right-brain, intrinsic)
Tokens (fungible)
Non-Fungible Tokens
42/ Have Happy Hour Mondays, not on Thursdays and Fridays. Give your team members something to look forward to on Mondays.
43/ “Outliers create bad mental models for founders.” – Founder Collective
44/ Once you break past product-market fit and hit scale, you have to start thinking about your second act. It’s about resource allocation. The most common playbook for resource allocation is to spend 70% of your resources on your core business, 20% on business expansion, and 10% on venture bets.
45/ The top three loads that a founder needs to double down or back on when hitting scale. “You have to stop being an individual contributor (IC). Stop being a VP. And you gotta hire great [VPs]. The sign of a great VP… is that you look forward to your 1:1 each week. And that plus some informal conversations are enough. Otherwise you’re micromanaging.” – Jason Lemkin.
46/ If you could write a function to mathematically approximate the probability of success of any given person on your team, what would be the coefficients? What are the parameters of that function? Inspired by Dharmesh Shah.
47/ The team you build is the company you build. And not, the plan you build is the company you build. – Vinod Khosla.
48/ “The output of an organization is equal to the vector sum of its individuals. A vector sum has both a magnitude and a direction. You can hire individuals with great magnitude, but unless they were all pointed in the same direction, you’re not going to get the best output of the organization.” – Pat Grady summarizing a lesson he learned from Elon Musk.
49/ “The founder’s job is to make the receptionist rich.” – Doug Leone
50/ “The amount of progress that we make is directly proportional to the number of hard conversations that we’re willing to have.” – Mark Zuckerberg quoting Sheryl Sandberg.
52/ Hire for expertise, not experience. The best candidates talk about what they can do, rather than what they did.
53/ A great early-stage VP Sales focuses on how fast they can close qualified leads, not pipeline. Also, great at hiring SDRs. It’s a headcount business.
54/ A great early-stage VP Marketing focuses on demand gen and not product or corporate marketing.
55/ Kevin Scott, now CTO of Microsoft, would ask in candidate interviews: “What do you want your next job to be after this company?” Most of your team members realistically won’t stick with the same company forever. This is even more true as you scale to 20, then 50, then 100 team members and so on. But the best way to empower them to do good work is to be champions of their career. Help them level up. Help them achieve their dreams, and in turn, they will help you achieve yours.
56/ When you’re looking to hire people who scale, most founders understand that a candidate’s experience is only a proxy for success in the role. Instead, ask: “How many times have you had to change yourself in order to be successful?” Someone who is used to growing and changing according to their aspirations and the JD are more likely to be successful at a startup than their counterparts. Inspired by Pedro Franceschi, founder of Brex.
57/ The best leading indicator of a top performing manager is their ability to attract talent – both externally and internally. “The ability to attract talent, not just externally, but also internally where you’ve created a reputation where product leaders are excited to work not just with you, but under you.” Inspired by Hareem Mannan.
58/ When you’re hiring your first salespeople, hire in pairs. “If you hire just one salesperson and they can’t sell your product, you’re in trouble. Why? You don’t know if the problem is the person or the product. Hire two, and you have a point of comparison.” Inspired by Ryan Breslow.
59/ The longer you have no team members from underestimated and underrepresented backgrounds and demographics, the harder it is to recruit your first.
On governance…
60/ You don’t really need a board until you raise the A. On average, 3 members – 2 common shareholders, 1 preferred. The latter is someone who can represent the investors’ interests. When you get to 5 board seats (around the B or C), on average, 3 common, 1 preferred, and 1 independent.
61/ As you set up your corporate board of directors, set up your personal board of directors as well. People who care about you, just you and your personal growth and mental state. Folks that will be on your speed dial. You’ll thank yourself later.
62/ You can’t fire your investor, but investors can fire you, the founders. That’s why it’s just as important, if not more important, for founders to diligence their investors as investors do to founders. Why for founders? To see if there’s founder-investor fit. The best way is to talk to the VC’s or angel’s portfolio founders – both current and past. Most importantly, to talk to the founders in their past portfolio whose businesses didn’t work out. Many investors will be on your side, until they’re not. Find out early who has a track record for being in for the long haul.
63/ Echoing the previous point, all your enemies should be outside your four walls, and ideally very few resources, if at all, should be spent fighting battles inside your walls.
64/ Standard advisor equity is 0.25-1%. They typically have a 3-month cliff on vesting. Founder Institute has an amazing founder/advisor template that would be useful for bringing on early advisors. You can also calculate advisor equity as a function of:
(their hourly rate*) x (expected hours/wk of commitment) / (40 hours) x (length of advisorship**) / (last company valuation) *based on what you believe their salary would be **typically 1-2 years
65/ Have your asks for your monthly investor updates at the top of each email. Make it easy for them to help you. Investors get hundreds every month – from inside and outside their portfolio. I get ~40-50 every month, and I’m not even a big wig. Make it easy for investors to help you.
66/ Monthly/quarterly investor updates should include, and probably in the below order:
Your ask
Brief summary of what you do
Key metrics, cash flow, revenue
Key hires
New product features/offerings (if applicable)
67/ In his book The Messy Middle, Scott Belsky quotes Hunter Walk of Homebrew saying, “Never follow your investor’s advice and you might fail. Always follow your investor’s advice and you’ll definitely fail.”
68/ While you’re probably not going to bring on an independent board member until at or after your A-round, since they’re typically hard to find, once you do, offer them equity equivalent to a director or VP level, vested over two to three years (rather than four). Independent board members are a great source for diversity, and having shorter schedules, possibly with accelerated vesting schedules on “single trigger”, will keep the board fresh. Inspired by Seth Levine.
69/ “A company’s success makes a VC’s reputation; a VC’s success does not make a company’s reputation. In other words to take a concrete example, Google is a great company. Google is not a great company because Sequoia invested in them. Sequoia is a great venture firm because they invested in Google.” – Ashmeet Sidana. This seems like obvious advice, but you have no idea how many founders I’ve met started off incredible, then relied on their VC’s brand to carry them the rest of the way. Don’t rely solely on your investors for your own success.
70/ “Invest in relationships. Hollywood idolizes board meetings as the place where crucial decisions are made. The truth is the best ideas, collaboration, and feedback happen outside the boardroom in informal 1:1 meetings.” – Reid Hoffman
71/ When your company gets to the pre-IPO stage or late growth stages, if you, as the founding CEO, are fully vested and have less than 10% ownership in your own company, it’s completely fine to re-up and ask your board for another 5% over 5 years. No cliffs, vesting starts from the first month. Inspired by Jason Calacanis.
72/ A great independent board member usually takes about 6-9 months of recruiting and coffee chats. You should start recruiting for one as early as right after A-round closes. In terms of compensation, a great board member should get the same amount of equity as a director of engineering at your current stage of the company, with immediate monthly vesting and no cliff. Inspired by Delian Asparouhov.
73/ If your cap table doesn’t have shareholders with equity that is differentiated (i.e. everyone owns the same size of a slice of the pie), then their value to the company won’t be differentiated. No one will feel responsible for doing more for the business. And everyone does as much as the lowest common denominator. It becomes a “I only have to do as much as [lowest performer] is doing. Or else it won’t be fair.”
74/ “If you ‘protect’ your investor updates with logins or pins, you will also protect them from actually being read.” – Paul Graham
On building communities…
75/ Every great community has value and values. Value, what are members getting out of being a part of the community. Values, a strict code of conduct – explicit and/or implicit, that every member follows to uphold the quality of the community.
76/ Build for good actors, rather than hedge against the bad actors. I love Wikipedia’s Jimmy Wales‘ steak knives analogy. Imagine you’re designing a restaurant that serves steak. Subsequently, you’re going to be giving everyone steak knives. There’s always the possibility that people with knives will stab each other, but you won’t lock everyone in cages to hedge against that possibility at your restaurant. It’s actually rather rare for something like that to happen, and we have various institutions to deal with that problem. It’s not perfect, but most people would agree that they wouldn’t want to live in a cage. As Jimmy shares, “I just think, too often, if you design for the worst people, then you’re failing design for good people.”
77/ If you’re a consumer product, Twitter memes may be the new key to a great GTM (go-to-market) strategy. (e.g. Party Round, gm). As a bonus, a great way to get the attention of VCs. There’s a pretty strong correlation between Twitter memes and getting venture funding. Community, check. Brand, check. Retention and engagement, check.
On pricing…
78/ For B2B SaaS, do annual auto-price increases. Aim for 10% every year. Why?
Customers will try to negotiate for earlier renewal, longer contract periods.
When you waive the price increases, customers feel like they’re winning.
You can upsell them more easily to more features.
79/ If you’re a SaaS product, you shouldn’t charge per seat. Focus on charging based on your outcome-based value metric (# customers, # views per video), rather than your process-based value metric (e.g. per user, per time spent). If you charge per seat, aka a process-based value metric, everything works out if your customer is growing. But incentives are misaligned when your customer isn’t. After all, more users using your product makes you more sticky, so give unlimited seats and upsell based on product upgrades.
80/ Charge consumers and SMBs monthly. And enterprises annually. The former will hesitate on larger bills and on their own long-term commitment. The latter doesn’t want to go back to procurement every month to get an invoice approved. Equally so, the latter likes to negotiate for longer contracts in exchange for discounts. Inspired by Jason Lemkin.
On product/strategy…
81/ Having a launch event, like Twitchcon, Dreamforce, Twilio’s Signal, or even Descript’s seasonal launch events, aligns both your customers and team on the same calendar. Inspired by David Sacks’ Cadence. For customers, this generates hype and expectation for the product. For your team, this also sets:
Product discipline, through priorities, where company leaders have to think months in advance for, and
Expectations and motivates team members to help showcase a new product.
82/ Startups often die by indigestion, not starvation. Exercise extreme focus in your early days, rather than offering different product lines and features.
83/ “Epic startups have magic.” Users intuitively understand what your product does and are begging you to give it to them. If you don’t have magic yet, focus on defining – quantitatively and qualitatively – what your product’s magic is. Ideally, 80% of people who experience the magic take the next step (i.e. signup, free trial, download, etc.). Inspired by John Danner.
84/ To find product-market fit (PMF), ask your customers: “How would you feel if you could no longer use our product?” Users would have three choices: “Very disappointed”, “Somewhat disappointed”, and “Not disappointed”. If 40% or more of the users say “very disappointed”, then you’ve got your PMF. Inspired by Rahul Vohra.
85/ For any venture-backed startup founder, complacency is cancer. As Ben Horowitz would put it, you’re fighting in wartime. You don’t have the luxury to act as if you’re in peacetime. As Reid Hoffman once said, “an entrepreneur is someone who will jump off a cliff and assemble an airplane on the way down.”
86/ Good founders are great product builders. Great founders are great company builders.
87/ To reach true scale as an enterprise, very few companies do so with only one product. Start thinking about your second product early, but will most likely not be executed on until $10-20M ARR. Inspired by Harry Stebbings.
88/ Build an MVT, not MVP. “An MVP is a basic early version of a product that looks and feels like a simplified version of the eventual vision. An MVT, on the other hand, does not attempt to look like the eventual product. It’s rather a specific test of an assumption that must be true for the business to succeed.” – Gagan Biyani
89/ Focus on habit formation. “Habit formation requires recurring organic exposure on other networks. Said another way: after people install your app, they need to see your content elsewhere to remind them that your app exists.” And “If you can’t use your app from the toilet or while distracted—like driving—your users will have few opportunities to form a habit.” Inspired by Nikita Bier.
90/ “Great products take off by targeting a specific life inflection point, when the urgency to solve a problem is most acute.” – Nikita Bier. Inflection points include going to college, getting one’s first job, buying their first car or home, getting married, and so on.
91/ You’re going to pivot. So instead of being married to the solution or product, marry yourself to the problem. As Mike Maples Jr. once said about Floodgates portfolio, “90% of our exit profits have come from pivots.”
92/ Retention falls when expectation don’t meet reality. So, either fix the marketing/positioning of the product or change the product. The former is easier to change than the latter.
93/ To better visualize growth of the business, build a state machine – a graph that captures every living person on Earth and how they interact with your product. The entire world’s population should fall into one of five states: people who never used your product, first time users, inactive users, low value users, and high value users. And every process in your business is governed by the flow from one state to another.
For example, when first time users become inactive users, those are bounce rates, and your goal is to reduce churn before you focus on sales and marketing (when people who never used your product become first time users). When low value users become high value users, those are upgrades, which improve your net retention. Phil Libin took an hour to break down the state machine, which is probably one of the best videos for founders building for product-market fit and how to plan for growth that I’ve ever seen. It’s silly of me to think I can boil it down to a few words.
94/ When a customer cancels their subscription, it’s either your fault or no one’s fault. If they cancel, it is either because of the economy now or you oversold and underdelivered. So, make the cancellation (or downgrading) process easy and as positive as the onboarding. If so, maybe they’ll come back. Maybe they’ll refer a friend. Inspired by Jason Lemkin.
On market insight and competitive analysis…
95/ To find your market, ask potential customers: “How would you feel if you could no longer use [major player]’s product?” Again, with the same three choices: “Very disappointed”, “Somewhat disappointed”, and “Not disappointed”. If 40% or more of your potential customers say “not disappointed”, you might have a space worth doubling down on.
96/ Have a contrarian point of view. Traits of a top-tier contrarian view:
People can disagree with it, like the thesis of a persuasive essay. It’s debatable.
Something you truly believe and can advocate for. Before future investors, customers, and team members do, you have to have personal conviction in it. And you have to believe people will be better off because of it.
It’s unique to you. Something you’ve earned through going through the idea maze. A culmination of your experiences, skills, personality, instincts, intuition, and scar tissue.
Not controversial for the sake of it. Don’t just try to stir the pot for the sake of doing so.
It teaches your audience something – a new perspective. Akin to an “A-ha!” moment for them.
Backed by evidence. Not necessarily a universal truth, but your POV should be defensible.
It’s iterative. Be willing to change your mind when the facts change.
97/ Falling in love with the problem is more powerful than falling in love with the solution.
98/ If you’re in enterprise or SaaS, you can check in on a competitor’s growth plan by searching LinkedIn to see how many sales reps they have + are hiring, multiply by $500K, and that’s how much in bookings they plan to add this year. Multiply by $250K if the target market is SMB. Inspired by Jason Lemkin.
99/ Failures by your perceived competitors may adversely impact your company. Inspired by Opendoor’s 10-K (page 15).
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Any views expressed on this blog are mine and mine alone. They are not a representation of values held by On Deck, DECODE, or any other entity I am or have been associated with. They are for informational and entertainment purposes only. None of this is legal or investment advice. Please do your own diligence before investing in startups and consult your own adviser before making any investments.
There is an incredible wealth of people in this world who self-proclaim to have insights or secrets to unlocking insights. From parents to teachers to the wise soul who lives down the street. From coaches to gurus to your friendly YouTube ad. To mentors. To investors. While there are a handful who do have incredibly insightful anecdotes, their stories should serve as reference points rather than edicts of the future. Another tool in the toolkit. No advice is unconditionally right nor unconditionally wrong. All are circumstantial.
After all, a friend once told me: All advice is autobiographical.
The same is true for anything I’ve ever written. Including this blogpost in itself.
Over the past two weeks, as a first-time mentor, I’ve had the incredible fortune of working alongside and talking to some amazing founders at Techstars LA. At the same time, I was able to observe some incredible mentors at work. And in this short span of time so far, I’ve gotten to understand something very acutely. The dichotomy between mentors and investors. For the purpose of this blogpost, I’m going to focus on startup mentors, rather than other kinds of mentors (i.e. personal mentors). Although I imagine the two cohorts of mentors are quite synonymous.
While the two categories aren’t mutually exclusive, there are differences. A great mentor can be a great investor, and vice versa. But they start from two fundamentally different mindsets.
Investors/mentors
An investor tries to fit a startup in the mold they’ve prescribed. A mentor fits themselves into the mold a startup prescribes.
An investor thinks “Will this succeed?” A mentor thinks “Assuming this will succeed, how do we get there?”
An investor starts with “Why you?” A mentor starts with “Why not you?”
An investor evaluates how your past will help you get to your future. A mentor helps you in the present to get to your future.
An investor has a fiduciary responsibility to their investors (i.e. LPs). A mentor doesn’t. Or a mentor, at least, has a temporal responsibility to their significant other. Then again, everyone does to the people close to them.
An investor will be on your tail to hold you accountable because they’ve got skin in the game. A mentor might not.
You can’t fire your investor. You can theoretically “fire” your mentor. More likely, you’re going to switch between multiple mentors over the course of your founding journey.
An investor has a variable check size-to-helpfulness ratio. Who knows if this investor will be multiplicatively more helpful with intros, advice, operational know-how than the size of their check? A mentor has theoretically an infinite CS:H ratio. Check size, zero. Helpfulness, the sky’s the limit.
It’s also much harder to find a mentor than an investor, outside of startup communities, like On Deck and Indie Hackers, and acceleration and incubation programs, like Y Combinator and Techstars. Frankly, being a mentor is effectively doing free consultations over an extended period of time. And if you’re outside of these communities, the best way to bring on mentors is to bring them on as advisors with advisor equity. I would use Founder’s Institute’s FAST as a reference point. And Tim Ferriss‘ litmus test for bringing on advisors: If you could only ask 5-10 very specific questions to this person once every quarter, would they still be worth 0.5% of your company without a vesting schedule?
In closing
As I mentioned above, being a mentor and an investor isn’t mutually exclusive. The best investors are often incredible mentors. And some of the greatest mentors end up being investors into your startup as well. Having been in the venture world for a while, I’ve definitely seen all categories on this Venn diagram. Sometimes you need more of one than the other. Sometimes you need both. It’s a fluid cycle. And for the small minority of venture-scalable startups, it’s worth having both.
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“I was a swimmer since I was very young and, you know, I never won. I never won.”
You’re probably assuming this is how the opening scene of a movie about a future world-champion swimmer begins. The beginning of the world’s most amazing underdog story. And you’re wrong. Well, not completely wrong. This isn’t a story about the world’s next biggest Olympic swimmer. Although it might be well-timed with the Tokyo Olympics around the corner. This… is a story, in my humble opinion, of one of the world’s next biggest venture capitalists. A story of a young Bangkok girl who became a VC from learning how to lose.
I’ve never been the smartest kid on the block. At least in the IQ department. So I make it my mission to hang out with folks who are smarter and more driven than I am. Jeep is no exception. I met her last month. And as if going from a World Bank economist to Intel leadership to startup advisor and investor to lecturing at UC Berkeley’s Haas School of Business was not enough, in our first conversation, she shared an incredible set of contrarian insights. So earlier this month, I had to jump into another conversation with her.
Something about going long
If you’re a long-time fan of this blog, you know one of my favorite Bezos-isms is, “If everything you do needs to work on a three-year time horizon, then you’re competing against a lot of people. But if you’re willing to invest on a seven-year time horizon, you’re now competing against a fraction of those people, because very few companies are willing to do that.”
Jeep is that same kind of superhuman.
“I started as a competitive swimmer since I was seven, and I swam so much and so hard, like three kilometers a day. It’s just a lot of practicing. I never even won a medal. And I kept doing it. And that was hard.
“Because other kids they got medals in different styles. So I learned early on in life what losing actually meant. And I think that’s very important because a lot of smart kids, they never learn how to fail early on in their life. And it’s kind of like a winner’s curse because you know, when they’re the best at everything, since they were young, throughout college , once they come out, and they realize that the world is hard, they are doing things or want to pursue a career that their parents cannot help them, they become risk averse. Meaning they don’t want to try new things.
“So I never won in [any] swimming competitions. Until I got into college. When I got into college, at the time I already quit swimming. I quit in high school. So, I didn’t swim competitively anymore since I didn’t have time to practice. I picked up other activities like piano, which I came to love. In college, one of my friends asked me, ‘Hey Jeep, why don’t you come back to the competition?’ And she knew I never won. We were in the same race at so many events. And I said, ‘I don’t know. Let me try.’ So I tried again.
“So I got back to the practice routine. Adjust my strokes a little bit. And then I won. I got gold and silver medals for a college swimming competition. And I was like, ‘This is a joke. How could I win?’
I never won ever, like for ten some years. And I joke with my friend, ‘You know why, because everybody else quit!’ They quit about the same age in high school.
I just went for it. And that was one of the moments in life that I realized that it’s all about grit. You do what you love and you don’t quit. There will be a moment that you win.”
The analogy extends further
“Failure is the mother of success.” It’s an ancient Chinese proverb that my mom used to tell me again and again growing up. Every time I “failed.” Scored low on a test. Embarrassed myself on stage for a school musical. Placed fourth, right off the podium for multiple competitions. It’s funny thinking about it in retrospect since she turned out to be the exact antithesis of a stereotypical Asian parent. And I love it!
Take tbh, an app where you send your friends anonymous compliments, as an example. It launched back in late 2017. 73 days after its launch, it went from zero to 2.5 million daily active users, which subsequently led to a $100M acquisition by Facebook. To many, tbh looked like an overnight success. But it wasn’t. Nikita Bier, co-founder of tbh, and his team spent seven years with 15 failed products before they arrived at tbh. And with each iteration, they learned and compounded their lessons from their previous failure.
Clubhouse’s Paul Davison and Rohan Seth is another example of a seemingly overnight success. From Talkshow to Highlight (acq. Pinterest), the pair went through at least nine failed apps before they arrive at Clubhouse – last reported to have passed 10 million users. And valued at $4 billion. Their lead investor, Andrew Chen at a16z, spent eight years getting to know Paul.
One of my junior swim teammates told me years ago when I was at my prime, “David, I don’t think I can beat you as you are now. But I promise you I will beat you one day, even if that means after you retire.” At the time, I dismissed it as just another snarky comment, which athletes are prone to make from time to time. But now that I’m a bit wiser than I was in high school, I find that same comment incredibly prescient. It just so happened that a few years ago, we raced each other again. Both of us had long exited the competitive arena, and he won.
In closing
Near the end of our conversation, Jeep cited something Soichiro Honda, the namesake for the Honda Motor Company, once said. “Success can be achieved only through repeated failure and introspection. In fact, success represents 1% of your work which results only from the 99% that is called failure. Many people dream of success. To me success can be achieved only through repeated failure and introspection. In fact, success represents 1% of your work which results only from the 99% that is called failure.”
She further elaborated, “For people who grew up in a society, in a culture that does not easily accept failure, I want them to know that it’s actually not a bad thing to try and hear rejection. But along the way, they have to make sure that they learn.
“It’s the same thing when I teach UC-Berkeley students. I told my brilliant graduate MBA students that there is, for me – and it’s true – there is no stupid question. If other people think your question is stupid, but at least you learn. If you learn, there’s no stupid question. Do not ask good questions, if it means you don’t learn anything.”
In a way, I’m reminded of a peculiar quote by Karl Popper, “Good tests kill flawed theories; we remain alive to guess again.” While Popper was known to be quite the contrarian thinker of his day, the same seems to hold for questions. Good questions kill flawed theories. We remain alive to learn again. After all, speaking from personal experience, I often find myself burning the midnight oil to ask the perfect question. But in the pursuit of asking the “perfect question”, I’ve forgone the adventures I would have had to arrive at the answer I thought I sought.
We learn when we fail. We learn, to one day succeed. The greatest are the greatest because they have a higher propensity to fail than the average person. As the great Winston Churchill said, “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.”
And as Jeep said, “Winning is actually losing, but learning along the way.”
Thanks Jeep for helping with earlier draft edits!
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I wrote an essay about the three types of mentors exactly a year ago. Peer. Tactical. Strategic.
Peer mentor – Someone who has a similar level of experience as you do in a given field.
Tactical mentor – Someone who is 2-5 years ahead in experience, and someone who can check your blind side. Because they have gone through similar situations as you are currently going through not too long ago, they can provide context as to the variables (core and confounding) involved.
Strategic mentor (which I formerly called veteran mentor) – Someone who has attained success in a particular field as you would define it. While they won’t be able to help you in the play-by-play, they can provide the bigger picture – the macroscopic view. Assessing and reassessing your long-term goals – your true north.
Rocks, pebbles, sand
Many of you might be no stranger to the rocks, pebbles, sand analogy. As the metaphor goes, if your life were a jar, you’d want to fill it with rocks first, then pebbles, then sand. If you start off filling your life with sand, you will have no more space for rocks and pebbles. Similarly, if you start filling it with pebbles, you will only have space left for sand, but not rocks. Analogized, rocks are your life and career’s most important projects and milestones. Pebbles are the smaller projects that lend itself to the whole, some of which you could do without. Sand represents the day-to-day, week-to-week ups and downs.
Rocks
Strategic mentors are most useful once a year (or at best 2-3 times/year) to see if you’re aligned with your goals. They help you set the large milestones you want to accomplish in your life.
What matters?
What doesn’t?
Pebbles
Tactical mentors, you seek after you come up with a few solutions/hypotheses that you would like to test. You don’t seek them as often, but they can help provide context to what you’re going through now, largely from their own experience having gone through it recently.
What variables am I overlooking or underestimating their effects on the outcome? Or simply put, what could go wrong?
Sand
You seek peer mentors before you come up with your solution and in problem-solving mode. These are the mentors you’re going to be spending the most time with. And most likely, the most abundant category of your mentors.
How would you attempt to resolve this dilemma? What would you do if you were in my shoes?
What are new, innovative ways I can use to tackle this problem?
While they vary in their sizes, each rock, pebble and sand is necessary to live your most fulfilling life.
In closing
Over the years, I’ve had the great fortune of having some amazing mentors and mentor figures that have shone me the proverbial light when alone, I may have struggled to find. Yet equally so, I’ve met their antithesis. Luckily very few, but nevertheless. People who don the mantle of being a mentor, but cannot tolerate your success when you surpass them. The latter I met years ago when I indiscriminately and naively sought out mentors, for the pure sake of just having “mentors”. Arguably, as a foolhardy contest of ego and pride, specifically to compensate my feelings of ineptitude.
A mentor like a friend is someone who is happier and wishes for your success than sometimes you do for yourself. Often, independent of their own escape velocity. Simply put, they invest in your success. And of course with that pretext, they are a scarcity. Even of those are willing and free enough to be mentors, given the volume of their inbound, understandably, their response rate is exceedingly low.
While that fact shouldn’t deter you from seeking mentorship, it makes me cherish the time, effort, and advice I have been fortunate enough to receive.
In the words of Tom Landry, legendary head coach of the Dallas Cowboys, “A coach is someone who tells you what you don’t want to hear, who has you see what you don’t want to see, so you can be who you have always known you could be.”
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I recently tuned into, at the time of writing this post, Tim Ferriss’ third most recent podcast episode, interviewing Rabbi Sacks. Although I’m a regular listener to the show, I wasn’t expecting much. I neither have a history of being religious nor spiritual – merely peripheral curiosity. Yet, I don’t hesitate for one second to say: It is, by far, one of the most insightful and enlightening podcast episodes I’ve heard in 2020. So, if you have a spare 1.5 hours, I highly recommend it, especially if you’re looking for a perspective shift on:
Leadership,
Seeking peer approval,
What a single cold “call”/visit could get you,
And the need for “cultural climate change” in the understanding between the balance of “I” and “we”.
And Rabbi Sacks masterfully weaves these concepts together. While my reaction will never do his insights justice, two other thoughts, each paired with their own story, I had to double click on:
“Good leaders create followers, great leaders create leaders.”
“What happens when you’re in a situation in which you have done something that has generated widespread disapproval? How do you deal with that?
“Win the respect of the people you respect.”
And I digress.
The Bubble
I’ve lived my entire life so far in the Bay Area, barring a few vacations and excursions here and there. I was born here. I went through 12 years of grade school here. 13 if you count kindergarten. And though I had the option of leaving the Bay for college, I ended up choosing a school here as well. Truth be told, I might as well have “Made in the Bay” stamped on my forehead.
I live in a bubble. But I know I breathe in one. Not just geographically, but educationally, racially, sexually, socioeconomically, and so on.
Being a shy introvert pre-adulthood didn’t help with broadening my perspective on life either. I still remember the days in high school when I dreaded the teacher calling on me. Clammy palms, cold sweat, rigid spine. I would never vocally question disagreement. Equally, I would rather be a people pleaser than cause what I deemed to be unnecessary friction. I was a seafood hors d’ouevres of perturbation.
So, by inspiration from a mentor, I took actionable steps to conquer my own demons. Meet one new person you’re extremely excited to meet every single week for a year.
While I still carry the artifacts of myself yesterday, learning to balance myself between the person I thought and think I needed to become and the person I was, I began my journey 6 years ago.
The Pop in the Bubble
I’d be fronting if I said I wasn’t scared shitless when I began. Though I don’t think everyone in the world has this dilemma, I’m confident I am not alone. I had and have all these scenarios playing in my head. A bunch of ‘what-ifs’. What if they think I’m too nosy? What if they don’t have time to respond? Or what if they hate me for bothering them?
They say it gets better over time. And they’re not wrong. But I still have that lingering, gnawing feeling whenever I click send or put myself out there. While, over the years, the fears never fully dissipated, I’ve learned to tango with discomfort. In the words of my mentor who inspired my journey:
“You’re never as good as they say you are, but you’re also not as bad as they say you are. And hell, you can’t even be bad if they don’t even know who you are.”
… which I believe he drew inspiration from Lou Holtz. Shortly after, I clicked the “Send” button at the bottom of my first ‘curiosity’ email. After all, like he said, what’s the worst that can happen? Getting ignored. And as such, I would be no better nor worse off than I was and am in that cross section in time. With that assurance, it eventually led me to find my cold email “template” and hosting social experiments, like Brunches with Strangers.
The Where
Over the past few weeks, a few new people asked me: “Where do you find these people to reach out to?” Although it’s not the first and I assume certainly not the last, I thought I’d share in the form of this post as a possible inspiration for how we can grow, if I were to paraphrase Rabbi Sacks.
While I don’t characterize myself as a voracious reader, I allot time every day and have found many of my Senseis in the form of literature and discourse – online and offline, printed and taped, and in-person and remote. Including:
Books
Online articles/press releases
Newsletters
YouTube videos
Movies
Podcasts
Webinars/fireside chats
Textbooks
And, other people
One level deeper
To look beyond my own horizon, I tune into Pocket‘s Discover tab, or a platform I’ve recently fallen in love with, Readocracy. You can check out what online reading I’ve been up to lately on my Readocracy profile. And I can’t wait, when I can start tracking the books I read and the podcasts I listen to on there. I’m also fortunate enough to have friends who read, write, listen, and socialize with different social and professional circles than I do and am in. And as I meet more people, the spectrum of topics and interests snowball upon each other, as we help each other see new perspectives – some of which we never thought were possible.
Admittedly, where I find who to reach out to is, by no means, special or esoteric. In topics, I look into ones I’m genuinely interested in, in that moment and predictably beyond, even if it’s only a month or two, as promiscuous as I might be for many. In my short phases of promiscuity, I nevertheless take deep dives. Deep, yet often, not long. At the same time, I have a small handful of evergreen interests, like:
The art and science of building relationships,
The art of creating irreplaceable memories,
Psychology and mental models,
Swimming and intense athleticism,
Art as a multi-faceted definition,
Startups,
Technology and what lies at its frontier,
The final frontier – outer space and its cosmological inhabitants,
And the future.
In people, I look for two things:
Inflection points in their life. Oxymorons/ironies. Overt and covert contradictions.
If I were to make assumptions given their initial attributes (i.e. education, age, gender, geography, career, life choices/circumstances, etc.), would I have been able to predict where they are now?
Of course, in making these assumptions, it is also my responsibility to be aware and to tread carefully where I should. Unfortunately, ignorance is not an excuse. If I’m unsure, I err on the side of caution.
Deep intellectual curiosity and passion. Whom I call the passionately curious and the curiously passionate.
In closing
While I’m prone to talking too much at times, during these moments, it is my duty and the highest form of respect I can offer, to listen. If I were to take it from a selfish note, I learn so much more when I listen. And in actively listening, and actively checking my biases, to respond with thoughtful questions.
So, I’ll close on more thing Rabbi Sacks said in his recent interview with Tim Ferriss:
“Safe space means that courteous discipline of respectful listening.”
#unfiltered is a series where I share my raw thoughts and unfiltered commentary about anything and everything. It’s not designed to go down smoothly like the best cup of cappuccino you’ve ever had (although here‘s where I found mine), more like the lonely coffee bean still struggling to find its identity (which also may one day find its way into a more thesis-driven blogpost).Who knows? The possibilities are endless.
Stay up to date with the weekly cup of cognitive adventures inside venture capital and startups, as well as cataloging the history of tomorrow through the bookmarks of yesterday!
Over the weekend, I was brewing up some mad lemonade. ‘Cause well, that’s the summer thing to do. Since I’m limited in my expeditions outdoors, it’s just watching the sun skim over the horizon, blossoming its rose petals across the evening sky, in my backyard, sipping on homemade lemonade. If you’re curious about my recipe, I’ll include it at the bottom of this post.
Thomas Keller. An individual probably best known, among many others, for his achievements with The French Laundry. Needless to say, I was enamored by his talk. But the fireworks in my head didn’t start going off until the 12:46 mark.
It was late that summer Friday evening. The sun had just crossed the horizon, changing the sky from blood orange red to a deeper indigo. Having put in 9000 yards, half of which were back-to-back sprints, we finally wrapped up our 2-hour practice, exhausted and slightly bewildered.
‘Twas our new coach’s first day on the job. We were expecting a chill practice, but this stranger made us work for it. And he did not beat around the bush. Relentless. In sum, he was the Gordon Ramsay of swimming.
Needless to say, he didn’t make the best impression on the team. And it was fair to say that some of my teammates were not his biggest fans. As they all shuffled out, and I had to wait for my parents to come pick me up from practice, I helped Coach with pulling the tarp covers over the pool.
Breaking the silence, he asks, “David, d’ya like to swim?”
“Of course,” I reflexively reply.
“Why d’ya like it?”
“It’s fun. I made friends. It helps me de-stress.”
“No.” And his next few words changed my perspective forever – both in swimming and in life. “You like to swim because you’ve won.”
Showing Gratitude
Obviously, in my prepubescent self, I took my coach’s comment for its face value. I like to swim because I’m good at it. Or at least, relatively speaking among my peers at that point in time. But as I grew older, that comment resonated with me on a different wavelength.
And a conversation with world-class hustler and founder of Fleeting (a company changing the landscape of trucking), Pierre*, last Friday reminded me exactly why. What I said then about why I liked to swim wasn’t completely wrong. I was able to achieve a moderate amount of success in the sport because my parents, coaches, teammates, and other friends supported and cheered for me. But I also forgot to thank one more for my accomplishments. The system itself.
Privilege of having access to coaches and supportive and ambitious teammates,
And, the seemingly minor technicalities,
My lane’s timers had faster reaction times compared to my competitor’s lane’s timers. For context, in regional meets, each lane would always have 3 timers each to record when you touched the wall on your finish, and they would take the median time as the final result.
My lane’s touchpad was working, but my competitor(s) may have had to rely on manual timers since their touchpad didn’t work. So, when it came down to close races and who touched the wall first, I would win.
Of course, there were moments I was a victim to said system as well. And I remember those moments far better than when I won as a result of the system.
So what?
The thing is, when everything is going my way, I often take it all for granted. One of the only times I realize and realized that there might be any flaws to the system are when I am left out. I have been and am a member of society that has profited from the systems – in swimming, in higher education, in work opportunities, just to name a few. And I’m sure there are even more I have yet to realize that I have benefited from.
The past few weeks have been a wake-up call to America, to the world, and to myself for what we have all let pass without questioning. And admittedly, it may be difficult to assess what explicit and implicit biases we have when we, in the words of Coach, are “winning”.
Diversity at the Table
So, it comes down to two fronts: internally and externally.
Internally, introspectively, let’s ask ourselves:
What have we won as a result of? And, what are we still winning in?
What have we benefited or profited from?
And just as there are winners, there exist still who have yet to win. Or win in a more consistent manner.
Externally, we need to bring into the fold those who have yet to win to help us assess what systemic flaws exist in our status quo. Frankly, it’s incredibly difficult to find our implicit biases alone. I know that I’ve been reminded multiple times in my life by those who are more cognizant in those arenas than I was and have been. And, those underrepresented and underestimated by the system can use all the help they can get.
Together, I’m confident we can find a better solution.
#unfiltered is a series where I share my raw thoughts and unfiltered commentary about anything and everything. It’s not designed to go down smoothly like the best cup of cappuccino you’ve ever had (although here‘s where I found mine), more like the lonely coffee bean still struggling to find its identity (which also may one day find its way into a more thesis-driven blogpost).Who knows? The possibilities are endless.
Stay up to date with the weekly cup of cognitive adventures inside venture capital and startups!
As much as investors love founders with passion (or obsession) and grit, they also want to invest in founders who have the capacity to grow as individuals as much as their startup grows. And that boils down to how curious and open-minded they are. In other words, how coachable are they? In the past 2 weeks, I’ve had the fortuity to talk to 2 brilliant angel investors – each with their own respective formula for measuring founder coachability.
Formula #1: Assessing Peer Coachability
Last year, I shared a post about the importance of all three levels of mentorship – peer, tactical, and veteran. With the most underappreciated one being peer mentorship. For the sake of this post, let’s call the first angel, Marie. Similarly, Marie finds that peer coachability acts as a useful proxy for founder coachability. And she approaches peer coachability in a very unique way:
What do you and you co-founder(s) fundamentally disagree on?
Following that question, usually 1 of 3 scenarios ensue:
The co-founders can state what they disagree on. And by follow-up question, share how they resolved that disagreement, then how that applies to their framework for resolving future disagreements.
They figure it out on the spot. Better sooner than later.
They say, “Nothing.” And quite possibly, the worst answer they could provide. ‘Cause that means they just don’t understand each other well enough. It’s highly unlikely that given how complex human beings are, that there can be two ambitious individuals who have the exact same outlook on life. Even twins have variations in their perspectives.
Knowing what co-founders disagree on assesses not only how well founders know each other, but also, how they’ve learned from each point of friction. Whether intentionally or not, they become each other’s coaches and push each other forward.
Formula #2: Assessing VC-Founder Coachability
Jerry, on the other hand, tests the waters by offering a controversial opinion about building a business or an insight into the industry, but one he has conviction and experience in. Then, he waits to see how the founder responds. The founder(s) can either:
Disagree, and subsequently walk through where the dissent starts and offer a sequence of data and analyses as to why he/she believes in such a way.
Agree, but still offer how he/she reached the same conclusion.
In either case, Jerry is looking for how mentally acute a founder is and how much room for discussion there is between them. On the other hand, the strike-outs regress to 2 categories:
Disagree, and spend time trying to convince Jerry why he is wrong, rather than working to persuade Jerry to possibly see a bigger picture he might not have considered before. And sometimes, this bigger scope includes a marriage of Jerry and the founder(s) insights.
Agree or disagree, but unfortunately, is unable to substantially back up their claim. Becoming a yes-man/woman in the former, or an argumentative troll in the latter.
The Mentorship Parallel
Unsurprisingly, just like how VCs use these methods to assess founder coachability, I’ve seen mentors use similar methods to assess potential mentees. Many aspiring mentees seek mentorship for its namesake – that metaphoric badge of honor. Not too far from the apple tree when people start a business or come to Silicon Valley to be called a CEO or for their company to be ‘venture-backed’. A category of folks we designate as “wantrapreneurs”.
And unfortunately, many aspiring mentees find bragging rights to be the mentee of [insert accomplished individual’s name]. Yet they don’t actually mean to learn anything meaningful, much less accept constructive criticism. Realistically, no mentor wants to go through that mess. “If you want for my advice, you better take it seriously,” as my first mentor once told me.
In closing
A great VC’s goal is to be the best dollar on your cap table, but they can’t be that Washington if you don’t let them be one. And though it doesn’t call for your investors or board members to micromanage, it does mean you are expected to be candid in both receiving and using (or not using) feedback.
