#unfiltered #10 Idea Journals – How to Start, Prompts that Stretch your Parameters, The “Right” Setting, Embracing Imperfection

idea-journaling, sunrise, sunset

Three weeks ago, in the prelude to this post, I mentioned the art of ideating and how I personally pursue the expansion of my creative horizons. Though I have or had other systems in place (i.e. whiteboard in the shower, pen in pocket everywhere I go, meditation), idea-journaling has been, by far, the most impactful in stretching my creative muscle.

When you start:

  • Dedicate your time to doing it daily, with no cheat days. Set aside ten minutes each day to do so.
  • Invest in a journal you love. Don’t skimp. I fell in love with the Moleskine sketchbook at first sight. Though I have graduated to the Leuchtturm1917 sketchbook now. For me, investing in a higher end journal made me more inclined to journal daily – not wanting my Hamiltons go to waste.
  • Don’t worry about completeness or complexity. A journal entry can be 1 sentence or 5 pages or even a drawing. Regardless, dedicate a minimum of 1 page to each entry, even if you only fill it in with 1 sentence.

Explore different mediums of thought. Here are some of the prompts I started with:

  • Write a short story.
  • Draw a picture.
  • Design a logo.
  • Compose a tune.
  • Jot down a recipe you think could work. And after, how would you plate this dish?
  • Create a new language.
  • Write a poem in that new language (or language that’s not your native tongue).
  • What stood out to you today?
  • Write out a conversation you would have with your role model, a celebrity, your boss, your friend. Or even what your follow-up conversation would look like with someone you talked to today?
  • How would you resolve a problem that’s plaguing you now?
  • If you could change or add one fundamental universal law, what would you change and why?
  • And, if you’re still stuck without a prompt, what should be the question or prompt you ideate with today?

Why? By exploring different avenues of creative output, you give your mind more degrees of freedom to think. Expand your parameters. That’s why multi-linguists are able to host such a vast vernacular bandwidth.

The Setting

Just like the process of idea-journaling, the setting in which you do so is equally as important. Why? You ideate best in a positive or neutral environment, when you won’t tie down emotions and biases to the environment you’re journaling in. Find your sweet spot, and make it a routine. When and where do you find yourself to be the most relaxed and/or the most creative?

For me, although I don’t shy away from ideating throughout the day, I find my mind the most expansive: (1) right after I work out, and (2) right after a good hot shower. And though rare, if the above two don’t work, I take at least a 20-minute walk, tuning into either a podcast episode I’ve heard before or a non-lyrical playlist.

Once I find peace in the preamble of my ideation “ritual”, then I settle down in a place where I feel comfortable and at home. Before the crisis, my go-to spot in the city was Sightglass Coffee on 7th. Now it’s in my backyard garden. With good lighting and a cup of chamomile or green tea.

Embracing Imperfection

My idea journals are a sanctuary for me to be imperfect. And arguably, its is where I found myself to be the most courageous. I didn’t have to cower in fear of judgment and biases from other eyes. And I can be unapologetically myself. Over the past 2 years, I’ve been lucky for that same courage to have bled outside of the book-bound acid-free pages.

If I can quote a line from the prologue of Bob Iger‘s brilliantly wicked book, The Ride of a Lifetime

“True innovation occurs only when people have courage[…] Fear of failure destroys creativity.”

Give yourself room to fail. You’re not going to like every single one of your ideas. In fact, if you’re like me, you might end up hating 4 out of 5 ideas you have when you first start off. But keep at it. Make it a habit. And one day, you’ll notice the distribution of good-to-bad ideas shift in your favor.

If you’re anything like me, when I get stuck, take some time to look up at the jewel-studded indigo canopy above. As your mind hops between one twinkle to the next, you might pick something up in the traversal.

As you make it a habit…

Although an unintentional upside when I embarked on this journey, the endeavor is truly meditative, perpetuating a positive feedback loop of euphoria. And over time, you’ll find yourself concepting more robust and intricate ideas. Hopefully, unbounded by your situational constraints. The sky’s the limit!

Photo by Leon Biss on Unsplash


#unfiltered is a series where I share my raw thoughts and unfiltered commentary about anything and everything. It’s not designed to go down smoothly like the best cup of cappuccino you’ve ever had (although here‘s where I found mine), more like the lonely coffee bean still struggling to find its identity (which also may one day find its way into a more thesis-driven blogpost). Who knows? The possibilities are endless.


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How Marriage Counseling Advice Applies to Managing Team Dynamics

marriage, relationship dynamics, team dynamics

Last Friday, I jumped on a call with my wickedly-creative founder friend. Given his cognitive flexibility, our conversations usually span a multitude of topics. And our Friday call was no exception – from product design to community management to de-stressors. Then, finally, marriage counseling and its applications in managing team dynamics.

Empirically, I focused my attention on co-founder dynamics when sharing an exercise I learned in my expedition to find the curiously passionate and the passionately curious. But I realize now that there are so many direct parallels on a broader scale to teams at large. From none other than a marriage counselor.

I want to preface that this exercise isn’t designed to be universal. And there’s a good chance it may not be useful for the situation you’re in or have been in. But nevertheless, hopefully, it can be another tool in your toolkit. So, if ever, when you do feel the need, it’s something that you can pull from your arsenal.

The Exercise

  1. Start every day gauging your individual gross energy level (i.e. motivation, excitement, emotional state) on a percentage scale with your partner(s)*.
    • * Yes, this was shared to me from a perspective that was inclusive of various forms of romantic relationships, including polyamory. Though I find it to be equally useful, when used among multiple co-founders/team members.
    • To put it into perspective, I usually sit around a 60-70%. When I’m inspired, motivated, or feel I can take on the world, I’m at 90-110%. Although extremely rare, when I’m down (i.e. sick, depressed, sad, unmotivated, stressed, in emotional turmoil, burnt out, or when I just want to regress to my shell), I’m usually at a 10-20%.
  2. Assess if you and your partner(s)’ collective energy level add up to 100% or more.
    • If one of you is feeling down, can (the rest of) you make up for that energy deficiency?
    • If I’m feeling 10%, and I just find it hard to get shit done, can my partner make up that 90% and help us as a team champion the day?
    • And let the person hovering 10% take the day off.
  3. If the collective energy just isn’t there, then the team falls on 2 types of contingency plans.
    1. Can you design a system (or if you already have a system in place) where all of you don’t have to put in 100%, but can still get things done?
      • Maybe this is the day to clean your house. Or wash the car.
      • For founding teams, maybe this is the day the whole team just does data entry.
      • For content creators, I hear this is the day to go through fan mail.
    2. Take the day off. Yes, the full day. And, no halfies. As great philosopher, Ron Swanson, once said:

“Never half-ass two things; whole ass one thing.”

  • Go take a day trip into the wilderness. Play video games. Read a fiction book. Draw. People-watch in a cafe (well, after the quarantine). Netflix-binge. Go tackle something on your bucket list.
  • And cap the downside – the potentiality of a slippery slope. I usually cap it at 3 days. Any longer, the counselor recommended seeing a relationship specialist.
    • Relationship counselor, if romantic.
    • Therapist/psychologist, if emotional.
    • Executive coach, if pertinent to co-founders.
    • Organizational therapist/psychologist, if pertinent to team.

What I didn’t realize until the Call

It seems obvious in retrospect, but it didn’t click until my buddy and I were thinking aloud. Subsequently, we realized how pertinent that exercise can be in understanding team workflows, as well as knowing when to double down and when to backpedal. Productivity has taken a sharp decline in this pandemic. For many, they’ve felt busier and working longer than before. The lack of diverse human interactions – for both extroverts and introverts – is really taking a toll. After all, we’re a social species. For managers, co-workers, and lateral teams, this exercise can be a way you can proactively assess your team’s morale and mental health. Assess early and optimize flexibly.

Photo by Sandy Millar on Unsplash


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The Third Leg of the Race

swimming, the third leg

I dedicated three-quarters of my life before I turned 18 to swimming. More than half of which I spent competitively. Although I never amounted to a Michael Phelps or Katie Ledecky, the years I spent swimming were some of the happiest, yet character-building times of my life.

I was a mid-to-long-distance swimmer – anything between 200 yards (or meters) to miles-long open-water swims in the SF Bay. By golly, the waters in the latter ‘pool’ were dirty. I couldn’t see my own hand when I reached out underwater. But I digress. As a distance swimmer, the biggest lesson I learned was how to fight the mental battlefield.

The Legs of a Race

Coach taught me to break every race down into 4 quarters. The first leg, the second leg, the third leg, and the last leg.

The first leg is comparatively the easiest. You’re brimming with energy, motivation and (potentially nervous) excitement. As long as you don’t exhaust yourself in this leg, but put in enough effort to break away from the pack, you’re golden. And in doing so, you’re going at 80% of your top speed.

The second leg is when you start engaging in a psychological battle with your competitors. Understand where they are in the race, as well as their racing personas.

  • Are they a front-half or back-half swimmer?
  • Are they a sprinter from the blocks?
  • Do they typically negative split in a race?
  • In an individual medley (IM) race, what’s their best stroke? Their worst stroke?

I typically dial back to 70% speed.

The last leg is probably the second easiest. You burn everything and anything you have in the tank. The goal is in sight – within reach. It comes down to how well you’ve raced the first three legs, and how much you trained. Effectively, it is a battle of strength – a Hail Mary. 110% speed.

Now let’s rewind back to the crucial leg I skipped. The whole reason I started writing this post.

The Third Leg of the Race

Whereas the second leg is based on ‘external warfare’ and the last leg is based on ‘physical warfare’, the third leg, and arguably the most important, is one based on ‘internal warfare’. By this point in the race, you’ve exhausted more than half of your energy, yet you’re expected to output more than when you started. You’re worn and tired. And, you can’t see the goal yet, so you know you have to save some strength for the last leg.

Yet, if you can hold this leg, it can mean the difference between a win and a loss. If you lose this leg and succumb to your thoughts, your chances of winning are slim. Quite frankly, it sucks.

So I made bets with myself.

“If I can finish this lap in 14 strokes, where I’m reaching out and scooping that ice cream just out of my arm’s reach, I’m going to treat myself to some Haagen Dazs after. One scoop for every lap I succeed in.”

“I’m going to flip turn faster than my opponents. And if I can do this thrice in a row, I’m going to get rock-solid abs when I finish this race.”

“I’m going to hold my breath till the other side of the pool, so I can smell and taste the teriyaki chicken.” *At swim meets, they’re always selling teriyaki chicken and rice for lunch. It’s greasy, super salty. But if you add some sriracha, it is a hungry swimmer’s heaven.

As you might notice, some of my bets were outright ludicrous. But it was because they were crazy that I was motivated to keep going. When there were no tangible goals, I made my own.

Why am I sharing this?

Life, seeking employment, running a business, and so much more run in the same way. After your academic career, no one really tells you what your goals are or can be. You have to make your own. When you’re job-seeking and no interviews are coming your way, you have to muster the strength to continue applying – either spraying and praying or finding creative ways to obtain certain opportunities.

In startup land, day 1 till day 365 (or even till day 730) will be a honeymoon. It’ll be the first leg. You’re hacking away by yourself or with pals on something you feel strongly about. For many, your next leg is scoping out the competition and pacing yourself.

  • Should you launch with press releases on TC, NY Times, etc?
  • Should you stay in stealth?
  • Can you continue bootstrapping?
  • Do you need to hire more people to help you out?
  • Which distribution channels are the most effective? Overlooked by competitors, but you think there’s a lucky draw in it.

And then, there’s the third leg. The leg that will decide if your adoption curve forms a hockey stick or a pitcher’s mound. You have a vague idea of where you need to go, but you haven’t hit critical mass. You’re questioning your initial assumptions. You might even be questioning yourself. Did you make the right calls? Is there anything you missed? What went wrong? Should you have just taken the job your friend offered?

But if there’s anything we’ve learned from some of the best entrepreneurs out there. It’s the ones who weather the storm – the ones who have that grit – that often make it. Being able to weather that third leg doesn’t guarantee success. But not being able to weather it is close to a sure-fire for failure.

As a world…

We’re on the third leg now.

And what we do now will decide if we win or lose the race.

Photo by chuttersnap on Unsplash


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Finding the Sweet Spot – Iterating What and How You Measure Product Metrics

iterating product metrics, measure, measuring tape

Many founders I meet focus on, and rightly so, optimizing their core metrics – a set of units that surprisingly don’t change after its initial inception. But metrics and the way you measure them should undergo constant iteration. Metrics are a way to measure and test your assumptions. 9/10 assumptions, if not all, are honed through the process of iteration. And by transitive property, the metrics we measure, but more importantly, the way we measure them, is subject to no less.

Though I’m not as heavily involved on the operating side as I used to be, although I try to, the bug that inspires me to build never left. So, let’s take it from the perspective of a project a couple friends and I have been working on – hosting events that stretch people’s parameters of ‘possible’. Given our mission, everything we do is to help actuate that. One such metric that admittedly had 2 degrees of freedom from our mission was our NPS score.

The “NPS”

“How likely would you recommend a friend to come to the last event you joined us in?” Measured on a 1-10 scale, we ended up seeing a vast majority, unsurprisingly in hindsight, pick 7 (>85%). A few 9’s, and a negligible amount of 5s, 6s, and 8s. 7 acted as the happy medium for our attendees, all friends, to tell us: “We don’t know how we feel about your event, but we don’t want to offend you as friends.”

We then made a slight tweak, hoping to push them to take a more binary stance. The question stayed the same, but this time, we didn’t allow them to pick 7. In forcing them to pick 8 (a little better than average) and 6 (a little worse than average), we ended up finding all the answers shift to 6s and 8s and nothing else. Even the ones that previously picked 9s regressed to 8s. And the ones who picked 5s picked 6s. Effectively, we created a yes/no question with just this small tweak.

There’s 3 fallacies with this:

  1. Numbers are arbitrary. An 8 for you, may not be an 8 for me. Unless we create a consolidated rubric that everyone follows when answering this question, we’re always going to variability in semi-random expectations.
  2. It’s a lagging indicator. There’s no predictive value in measuring this. By the time they answer this question, they’d already have made their decision. Though the post-mortem is useful, the feedback cycle between events was too long. So, we had to start looking into iterating the event live, or while it was happening.
  3. Answers weren’t completely honest. All the attendees were our friends. So their answers are in part, a reflection of the event, but also in part, to help us ‘save face’.

In studying essentialism, Stoicism, and Rahul Vohra‘s Superhuman, we found a solution that draws on the emotional spectrum that answered 1 and 3 rather well. Instead of phrasing our questions as “How much do you value this opportunity?”, we instead phrased them as “How much would you sacrifice to obtain this opportunity?” Humans are innately loss-averse. Losing your iPhone will affect you more negatively and for longer, than if you won a $1000 lottery.

So, our question transformed into: “How distraught would you be if we no longer invited you to a future event?”, paired with the answers “Very”, “Somewhat”, and “Not at all”. Although I’m shy to say we got completely honest answers, the answers in which we did give allowed for them to follow-up and supplement why they felt that way, without us prompting them.

The only ‘unaddressed’ fallacy by this question – point #2 – was resolved by putting other methods in place to measure attention spans during the event, like the number of times people checked their phone per half hour or the number of unique people who were left alone for longer than a minute per half hour (excluding bio breaks).

Feedback

“How can we improve our event?” We received mostly logistical answers. Most of which we had already noticed either during the event or in our own post-mortem.

In rephrasing to, “How can we help you fall in love with our events?”, we helped our attendees focus on 2 things: (1) more creative responses and (2) deep frustrations that ‘singlehandedly’ broke their experience at the event.

And to prioritize the different facets of feedback, we based it off the answers from the questions:

  • “What was your favorite element of the event?”
  • And, “How distraught would you be if we no longer invited you to a future event?”

For the attendees who were excited about elements closely aligned with our mission, we put them higher on the list. There were many attendees who enjoyed our event for the food or the venue, though pertinent to the event’s success, fell short of our ultimate mission. That said, once in a while, there’s gold in the feedback from the latter cohort.

On the flip side, it may seem intuitive to prioritize the feedback of those who were “Very distraught” or “Not at all”. But they exist on two extremes of the spectrum. One, stalwart champions of our events. The other, emotionally detached from the success of our events. In my opinion, neither cohort see our product truly for both its pros and cons, but rather over-index on either the pros or the cons, respectively. On a slight tangent, this is very similar to how I prioritize which restaurants to go to or which books to read. So, we find ourselves prioritizing the feedback of the group that lie on the tipping point before they “fall in love” with our events.

Unscalability and Scalability

We did all of our feedback sessions in-person. No Survey Monkey. No Google Forms, Qualtrics, or Typeform. Why?

  1. We could react to nuances in their answers, ask follow-up questions, and dig deeper.
  2. We wanted to make sure our attendees felt that their feedback was valued, inspired by Google’s Project Aristotle.
  3. And, in order to get a 100% response rate.

We got exactly what we expected. After our post-mortem, as well as during the preparation for our next event, I would DM/call/catch up with our previous attendees and tell them which feedback we used and how much we appreciated them helping us grow. For the feedback we didn’t use, I would break down what our rationale was for opting for a different direction, but at the same time, how their feedback helped evolve the discourse around our strategic direction. Though their advice was on the back burner now, I’ll be the first to let them know when we implement some element of it.

The flip side of this is that it looks extremely unscalable. You’re half-right. Our goal isn’t to scale now, as we’re still searching for product-market fit. But as you might notice, there are elements of this strategy that can scale really well.

In closing

Of course, our whole endeavor is on hold during this social distancing time, but the excitement in finding new and better ways to measure my assumptions never ceases. So, in the interim, I’ve personally carried some of these interactions online, in hopes of discovering something about virtual conversations.

Photo by Jennifer Burk on Unsplash


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Asking for Mentorship

asking for mentorship

Don’t.

… would be my short answer.

The longer answer… I’ll start with a story.

My First Mentor

This is embarrassing to admit, but 6 years ago, I barely knew what a resume was. As a hint of my ignorance, my first ‘resume’ was 3 pages long, double-spaced, and included two lines explaining a babysitting license I got back in middle school. So, within 10 seconds of it going up, I signed up for the resume workshop. In my hurry, I signed up for the first spot with the first “critique-er” I saw.

When the fateful day arrived, he didn’t show up at our appointed time. After waiting 15 minutes and asking the workshop leads, it turned out he was stuck in the depths of traffic.

But hell, I wasn’t going to go home empty-handed. So, I went around the bustling room, catching each “critique-er” there whenever they had a break, to ask them to look over my sad excuse of a resume. By the end of the two-hour workshop, I had taken notes about the flaws of my resume from every alumni there – half of whom ran through various interview questions with me – except for one. The one I had initially signed up with.

After hearing gossip and rumors from the alumni of how brutally honest he was, I had to meet this mysterious fellow. Eventually, he arrived. And luckily, the alumni invited me to join them for a late dinner. And that night, he left me with one sentence: “If you want my advice, you better take it seriously.” Not in the sense that I need to follow exactly what he tells me, but that I won’t hear then forget it the next morning.

Over the years, I’ve truly appreciated the analytical mind he brought to temper my creative mind. His advice saved my neck saved my neck at multiple crossroads of my career. He was able see around the corner when I couldn’t – a tactical mentor. Though I didn’t use his advice every single time, I always came back to him with the post-mortem.

  • How did I use his advice?
  • If I did, what was its impact?
  • If I didn’t, what was my internal calculus for choosing so?

He never pressured me to use his advice, nor did he ask that I report back to him each time. But I did. Over the years, I’ve been there for his highs and lows, just like he has been there for mine. Before we became mentor and mentee, we realized we had become friends. Ironically, to this day, he still hasn’t seen my resume.

The Bigger Picture

You might call it availability bias, but over the 6 years since then, I’ve reached out to many people – punching above my weight class, inspired to seek mentorship. But out of all the 20+ people that I asked for mentorship on the get-go, not a single one was willing to take on the responsibility for a stranger. And rightly so. Like any other relationship, mentorship requires time and commitment. Without any precedence, it’s hard to make that decision with asymmetric information.

The Venture Parallel

Even as investors, who notoriously have to be willing to not only mentor others through “just a pitch”, but also commit dollars to where their mouth is at, each round of startup funding takes at least 60-90 days of diligence and working together, before we invest. Our goal is to be ‘the best dollar on your cap table‘.

In a literal sense, a dollar is a dollar. Whether you get it from your parents as an allowance when you were 7 years old or from your managerial salary at 27 years old, it’s the same. But, in venture, there’s ‘dumb money’ – money in its most literal sense. And there’s ‘smart money’ – money that comes with advice, resources, social and professional networks, and help.

In most cases, an early-stage founder wants ‘smart money’. In that frame of mind, you want the investor(s) that have the best networks, the best resources, the best expertise, and possibly, the best brand, at your stage of a business. So your pitch should be hyper-specific. As with any ask in the world, nothing is ever guaranteed. But, to increase your chances of a “yes”, the best founders build that relationship before they need to fundraise.

Circling Back

For any other person out there, whose day job isn’t to take measured capital risk, you’ll have to work even harder to convince someone to take that leap of faith with you.

When you ask for mentorship, or advice, in general, follow through with it. Make it known that it is valued. And, show your progress after having tried it out. No person speaks hoping to reach deaf ears. So, if you don’t think you’ll have the mental and physical bandwidth to turn advice into action, don’t ask for advice. And definitely, don’t ask for mentorship. It’s not worth your time or theirs.

As a footnote to myself and to others who may be seeking advice, even with this mindset, there’s no silver bullet. Be curious. Be mindful. And, be creative. My favorite creative ‘ask’ so far is “I will pay you to work for you”.

And to my first mentor, Happy Birthday!

Photo by Juan Pablo Rodriguez on Unsplash


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The Psychological Tortoise and Hare

the tortoise and the hare, mental health, therapy, race

We’re all privy to our emotions. It’s what makes us human. And I am no exception. Like many people that I know, there have been many moments in my life when I’ve been stressed. When I felt forced to make split decisions. When I’m not rational. Only to regret my actions and words down the road. Despite it all, though I have friends and colleagues who have, I’ve never dipped my feet into therapy. Instead, after years of diligence, I found solace in other solutions to navigate through my mental gymnastics:

  • Meditation and visualization,
  • Exercise/swimming,
  • Gratitude journaling,
  • And, dream journaling.

Last week, I caught up with a founder who found her initial sanctuary in therapy – a service I have only observed from the periphery. Historically, therapy seems to have carried a negative stigma. If I were to say, “I’m going to see a therapist.”

Many people’s naturally response would be: “What’s wrong?” Subsequently, many people have used therapy and its cousins as a reactive measure, rather than a proactive one. Luckily the conversations around mental health have finally reached the limelight, and people, more talented than I am, are working to change the biases associated with mental health. Although just a comparatively small step, I’m writing this post now to help shed light to an industry that for too long has remained behind stained glass.

The toolkit of skills

“Therapy, just like any other class out there, pairs you with a set of skills to tackle the world.”

So, I asked her, “What was the most impactful skill you learned in therapy that enabled you to better react to the world around you?”

“There’s this process I learned, when in the moment, where I first identify the initial ‘bad’ cause. Then I notice and name all the colors in the room. And after I do so, then I identify the next action I would have taken after the ‘bad’ cause.”

Seeing, my perplexed look over Zoom, she elaborated, “In the beginning, I would count a lot of colors in the room. But over time, I only needed to count less. The reason… so that I could take time to think and react appropriately to situations.”

Just like I was taught to take deep breaths when Joey steals my crayon. Just like meditation isn’t inherently bad or good, it’s merely an exercise you do to channel your thoughts. If you become obsessed with negative thoughts, you will heighten you respective emotions. If you focus on more positive thoughts, you will leave with a happier state of mind.

Counting colors was that for her. And practice makes perfect, as do all skills – be it mental or physical. Our brain is a muscle that’ll only get better the more we stretch, ‘tear’, and put it through the wringer. Although now she’s “graduated” from such exercises, she still practices her mental discipline through other means, like journaling.

In closing

Too often, we regress to our instinctual emotions. The purpose of such exercises is to give time for our mammalian brain to catch up to our reptilian brain. Or, more scientifically put, for our pre-frontal cortex (PFC) to catch up to our amygdala. And in giving them time to level out the playing field, we are able to make a decision where we can minimize our regrets in the post-mortem.

I’m not advocating to throw away your emotions. Personally, on multiple occasions, I have to thank my emotions for the results I was able to achieve – from channeling anger and frustration to keep myself going in the last leg of an open-water race to embracing contentment to inspire me when writing. Emotions can be your strength or your weakness. But hopefully, in honing in the toolkit available to you, you are able to make better judgments at the many crossroads of your life. One of such tools in the toolkit may just be letting the tortoise catch up to the hare, metaphorically-speaking. Or the hare catch up to the tortoise, physiologically-speaking.

Photo by Pietro Mattia on Unsplash


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Drawing Inspiration

drawing inspiration, ideas, eclipse, writer's block

On Tuesday, I had the great honor to jump on a call with someone who is both a brilliant composer and an acclaimed orchestral conductor. Though he was classically trained, he found fame in the world of video games. And I couldn’t help but ask where he draws his inspiration when composing musicality to pair with various mediums of entertainment, even outside of games. He answered simply:

“Everywhere.”

He followed up that to help him frame his ideas around the subject of his piece: “I watch a little bit, not too much to have the show or game dominate in his mind, but enough to start off.” Just a small spark to start the fire. What he said echoed in mind, reminding me of a conversation I had with another friend – entrepreneur, author, and podcaster – prior to self-quarantining ourselves. He told me: “There’s no such thing as writer’s block. It’s that desire for perfection that holds us back from putting our pen on paper. But once we let go of trying to be perfect, we can find inspiration from everything around us.”

In all honesty, when he first told me this, I thought he was being quite presumptive. Especially it was at a point in time I was struggling to find content to put out weekly. But he was right. And, as you may have guessed, that became the kindling for the #unfiltered series.

Similarly, a few weeks back, a college buddy asked me where I find my inspiration for pieces on this blog. Though I am echelons shy of the musical talent I spoke with two days ago, I offered him the path I took to get me here:

  • Practice ideating daily.
  • Talk to people.
  • Meditate and/or write in a gratitude journal.
  • Write an audience of one.

Practice ideating daily.

My brain, like your brain, is a muscle. The more I practice using it, the better it gets. The same is true for ideas. The more ideas I write, the better I’ll get. It can be one sentence. Or, it can be 5 pages. But make sure to dedicate at least a full page to each day, even if 95% of it may be blank. The point is to deliberately do so every day, with no cheat days. Personally, I spent the first 2 weeks, writing one sentence entries.

So, I invested in an idea journal. In fact, probably my best investment I made in the past 3 years. And, I didn’t bother buying a cheap one. It was a Moleskine art sketchbook. At the time, a $17 purchase plus tax. And for a broke college student, that was a sizable amount – two good meals worth. A good alternative and the one I use now is a Leuchtturm1917 sketchbook. Why? Because it forced me to use it. I realized for me, the better the notebook is, the more I’m inclined to not let it go to waste.

Although I wish this was my original idea, my professor at Cal taught me this simple, but effective strategy.

Talk to people.

When I found myself unable to grasp at any ideas (that I thought were good), I talked to people. The more obsessive they were about their passion, the better. The more (positive and negative) emotion they channel into their work, the more insight they’ll have. And, frankly, excitement is contagious.

Talk to at least one of them from this cohort a week. Take notes, follow up, and ask more questions. The last part usually more independently, depending on their bandwidth.

Meditate and/or write in a gratitude journal.

Be thankful. It’s a useful frame of mind to be in. Positive thinking helps with more expansive creativity. Negative thoughts and stress, depending on its severity, narrows down the scope of your creativity.

Write for an audience of one.

Many professional writers are taught to find a target audience and write for them. Focus on a specific segment, before broadening, if ever. My mentors taught me to take this one step further. Instead one specific segment, just one person. It’s much better to write for 1 person who I know will always love my content than to write for a hypothetical many who may or may not even like it. For me, it’s myself. When I’m writing here, I’m merely a hobbyist. I don’t have any grand goal of reaching one million subscribers (not that I’m opposed to it). I’m just here to immerse myself in the joy of writing. And if I am lucky to have affected someone else’s life in a meaningful way, that’s my cherry on top.

Photo by Jongsun Lee on Unsplash


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#unfiltered #9 Living to Eat – Supporting the Service Industry, Fine Dining Musings, Restaurant Selection Criteria, Tipping, and the Notebook

living to eat, fine dining

I had originally planned to write this post back in February, but when the coronavirus came crashing in 6th gear, I thought it would have been unwise to urge you, friends and family to venture beyond your doorstep. So this post fell into the depths of despair, hoping to find its way to center stage after we were on the road to recovery and when restaurants reopened.

But yesterday, over a Zoom call, in catching up with a fellow foodie and college buddy, he suggested that I still post this. Not to urge people to eat out. But as a voice to support the many struggling restaurants, cafés and bars out there – many of which include our personal favorites. Before I dive into this post, I want to explicitly note 2 disclaimers:

Disclaimer 1: As I mentioned above, this post is not written to incentivize you to go eat out now, but rather just illustrate my musings as someone who loves food. And as many other businesses are feeling the brunt of the impact in the status quo, the culinary industry is no exception. Your favorite restaurant yesterday may not exist tomorrow. And you won’t even be able to experiment with any of the below musings if we don’t put a hand out now and support them when they need us most.

Disclaimer 2: I am neither a professional chef/cook nor is my trade being a food critic. So take what I say with a grain of salt, as with anything I write. Below is merely my observations in one of my most expensive hobbies as a foodie.

Given the extravagant length of this post, here’s a TL;DR:

  • Why I don’t resort to Yelp/Google when picking a new dinner destination
    • And a couple of my favorite restaurants in the Bay Area
  • My calculus for tipping – and why there are times I choose to not tip
  • Why a notebook may be your best friend in your culinary adventures
Continue reading “#unfiltered #9 Living to Eat – Supporting the Service Industry, Fine Dining Musings, Restaurant Selection Criteria, Tipping, and the Notebook”

#unfiltered #8 The Oasis – Fiction, Books I’ve Recommended/Gifted the Most, How I’ve Kept Myself Busy Outside of Work

book, fiction, reading

Lately, I’ve picked up a few fiction books – 2, to be specific – The Three Body Problem by Liu Cixin and Mistborn: The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson, by recommendation of a friend and founder, respectively. And damn, they’ve rekindled my love for worldly escapes. Prior to high school, I used to be the biggest fanatic of fiction books. Although proportionally smaller, my fictional “library” at home still includes:

  • every single book in the Magic Tree House series by Mary Pope Osborne
  • the entire Redwall series by Brian Jacques,
  • every single one in the LEGO Bionicle series,
  • the Alex Rider series by Anthony Horowitz,
  • Dune by Frank Herbert,
  • The Steel Wave by Jeff Shaara,
  • and much more.

And to further how much I nerded out over fiction, I knew our local librarians by their first name and memorized by library card number by heart (to this day) – all for the sake of fiction. But as I grew older and entered my teens, I was told that I should have outgrown fiction. That it should stay as a remnant – a fond memory – of my “youth”. So, I slowly acquired the taste for non-fiction, biographies/autobiographies, business books and documentaries.

Yet, in some ways, in this serendipitous situation, when now I have more free time, and by fervent inspiration from the two aforementioned angels, I found sanctuary in other worlds. I saw with my imagination and heard with my eyes. For lack of better words, it was magical.

From non-fiction, I’ve been able to walk alongside the greats who have once or now inhabit the reality on this small blue pearl amidst a sea of unknown. From fiction, I’ve been able to walk alongside the greats who have never lived in this reality, maybe never will, but somewhere out there, they hold the keys to our dreams. Each hold a proud seat in my heart, but the latter has been dormant for over a decade.

Books I’ve Recommended/Gifted the Most

I should preface that I’m not the most voracious reader out there – although that’s been changing over the past 4-5 weeks. But here are my favorites which I’ve recommended/gifted the most:

  • 2018 fav – The Messy Middle by Scott Belsky
    • Short (1-3 pages, on average), but incredibly insightful chapters of product/design/leadership lessons from a founder/investor/product leader, especially during messy times post-honeymoon stage of being an entrepreneur. My favorite pages… 232-234. A set of three questions to create a lovable product.
  • 2019 fav – The Trillion Dollar Coach by Eric Schmidt, Jonathan Rosenberg, and Alan Eagle
    • A dedication to the most well-known least famous person in Silicon Valley. From the book title, you might be able to guess what he did – all of which he took zero compensation for. Having been suggested and subsequently read too many leadership books earlier in my career, when I first suggested this one, I was quite skeptical. I thought it was just another one of those, until I heard the name, Bill Campbell. A name which I’ve heard more than once from various people who attributed their success to him, since 2016. And I’m so glad I didn’t dismiss this one. I only wish I could have gotten to know the amazing person this book is dedicated to.
  • Startup fav – The Hard Thing About Hard Things by Ben Horowitz
    • A book that doesn’t sugarcoat the tough decisions in building a company – a set of decisions illustrating on how he dealt with situations when things just wasn’t going his way. Rather than being prescriptive, it gave me a framework for understanding the various struggles a founder will encounter – most of which I had yet to see when I was recommended to read this book. Quite pertinent in today’s landscape, ironically.
  • Most nostalgic/impactful on personal growth – The Art of War by Sun Tzu
    • I was first given this book when I graduated from elementary school, as the problem child, though not in the traditional sense. I had a knack for blaming others when problems arose, but this book helped me understand people better and where people were coming from. In all honesty, I don’t know why it clicked when I was only 10, but it did. Apart from my childhood bias, though specific to leadership in a military regime, you can draw several parallels between the art of war and business and life.
  • Fiction fav – Salamandastron by Brian Jacques
    • Brian Jacques throughout the entire Redwall series just has such a way to weave suspense and an emotional attachment to the various characters. Admittedly, it was the first fictional book I cried to while reading, so it holds a special place in my heart.

For the sake of not overwhelming you with too much, I’ve only included the ones I’ve statistically recommended/given the most, as well as gotten the most positive reactions from folks I’ve offered these to. If you’re interested in a more exhaustive list, feel free to DM me – either through this blog or social media.

Keeping Body and Mind Busy

For many of my other friends and colleagues, they have found similar solace in books. Many in the kitchen. Some with instruments and a camera. A handful with a mic and Twitch or Anchor.

Because I have saved 2-3 hours of travel time every day now, I’ve been:

  • Doodling at least thrice a week in my Leuchtturm notebook, specifically their medium sketchbook (180g/sqm, so on the thicker end of pages);
  • Jumping on game sessions with friends over the weekends, like on Skribbl.io or recently, Songversations (Discord is definitely my favorite medium of social interaction, especially with all the bots they have. My favorite of which is the Groovy music bot where I can tune into music alongside my friends);
  • Reaching out to 1 new person I’m insanely curious about every week;
  • Idea-journaling every day;
  • Trying new recipes and methods in the kitchen;
  • Trying new home workout routines;
  • Reading fiction and non-fiction;
  • Writing for this blog 😀 ;
  • And, a new social experiment between friends, family, and colleagues, in hopes of making this world feel a little smaller, just a little closer, and a whole lot more interesting.

So, if you have the time and privilege to, explore new/’new’ genres and mediums of storytelling, creativity, and activity. Some may very well surprise you!

Photo by Ksenia Makagonova on Unsplash


#unfiltered is a series where I share my raw thoughts and unfiltered commentary about anything and everything. It’s not designed to go down smoothly like the best cup of cappuccino you’ve ever had (although here‘s where I found mine), more like the lonely coffee bean still struggling to find its identity (which also may one day find its way into a more thesis-driven blogpost). Who knows? The possibilities are endless.


Stay up to date with the weekly cup of cognitive adventures inside venture capital and startups!

#unfiltered #7 Words are Food – Having Empathy, Job Resources Now, Letting Staff Go, and Perspective Shifts

words are food, empathy

I jumped on a call with my good buddy, incredible founder and one of the most magnanimous people that I know, Mike, not too long ago. And no, he did not pay me to say that. As always, we nerded about everything on the face of this planet, but one thing in particular stood out to me. And inevitably manifested into the foundation of this #unfiltered post. He said, just 3 words:

“Words are food.”

The more we delved into this rabbit hole, the more robust the metaphor began. But for the sake of not running your ear off, I’ll cover just one facet of our parallel.

Compliments are sweets. They’re great in moderation, but too many give you cavities. They wrap up a great meal, but you cannot live your life only indulging in compliments. On the other hand, constructive criticism are your vegetables. They may not taste the best, but they’re healthy for you. And a healthy diet should consist of mostly fruits and veggies. Yes, brussel sprouts and eggplants too. Of course, it’s important to note that blatant criticism, like “You suck” or “You’re dumb” is garbage. They neither taste good nor are they healthy for you. You can smell it from miles away. So just steer clear.

After all, you are what you eat. 😀

Empathy in Words

In the past 4 months, we are all going through a transitory stage in our lives – some more drastic than others. Some of us have experienced the deaths of loved ones. Some, a test of relationship integrity. Others, career shifts and a change in household income. For those of you who have been affected by the job market, my friend passed me this resource which I hope you’ll find use in honing your job search. Anecdotally, it seems pretty accurate.

And almost everyone, a dietary change and restriction, due to the market’s supply and demand. And it’s more important a time than any (not that you shouldn’t when the curve flattens and the markets recover), be empathetic.

Be kind – with your actions and your words. In these times, it’s so easy to be caught up in what’s not going right in your life, but you’re not alone. You never are.

Empathy in Business Now

Although this applies to so many different aspects of our lives, I’ve found its pertinence on the business front recently. When the focus of businesses now is on cash preservation rather than growth, which I’ve alluded to in previous posts (1. cash in private markets, 2. heeding advice , 3. brand as a moat), aggressive decisions can be tough. As the saying goes, measure twice, cut once.

Here are some examples of said (preemptive) decisions I’ve seen from founders so far:

  • Reallocating 30% of the company budget to the core business from expansion and venture bets (70-20-10 rule of thumb to 100-0-0)
  • 50% cut to CEO salary, 10% cut to management, 5% from everyone else, to try to minimize layoffs
  • 100% cut to founder(s)’ salary, 35% cut to management, everyone else keeps theirs the same, while offering healthcare benefits for temporary workers/contractors

The conclusion for some founders may reach the point of laying off people who followed you believing in your dream. You can check out Mark Suster‘s, Managing Partner at Upfront Ventures, rubric for questions you need to consider in empathetic moments of business decisiveness.

Empathy won’t change decisions. The tough, but true remarks are your vegetables. People will still have to eat them, but be understanding of where the people eating the food you cooked up are coming from. Rather than boil your brussel sprouts, offer crispy ones with a soy glaze, a little heat, and a layer of bonito flakes.

Perspectives Forward

Recently, I had the fortune of connecting with a founder whose parents were refugee who found sanctuary in the states. She put things wonderfully into perspective, when comparing the current situation to the one she was familiar with as a child.

“There are 2 camps of refugees: (1) those who want things to go back to the way they were before, and (2) those who move forward knowing that life will never return to the ‘normal’ they once knew.

“And those who progress forward are those who believe in the latter.”

When the dust settles after all of this, life won’t ever be the same as it was 4 months ago. The hospitality, transportation, travel, and service industries, just to name a few, will irrevocably change. You friends and family may have lost dear ones.

Alas, I’m an optimist. And I know that we’re going to come out stronger than we were when we went in. We’re going to have to get used to a new diet. I dare say, even a new vernacular.


#unfiltered is a series where I share my raw thoughts and unfiltered commentary about anything and everything. It’s not designed to go down smoothly like the best cup of cappuccino you’ve ever had (although here‘s where I found mine), more like the lonely coffee bean still struggling to find its identity (which also may one day find its way into a more thesis-driven blogpost). Who knows? The possibilities are endless.


Stay up to date with the weekly cup of cognitive adventures inside venture capital and startups!